导读: because, said the little boy, 下面是中国招生考试网http: www chinazhaokao com 小编今天为大家精心准备了英语笑话100篇希望对 ...
英语笑话100篇(1)
There was a blonde that was so sick of blonde jokes she died her hair red. The jokes stopped and she felt so good, she took a ride in the country one Saturday afternoon. While on this ride, she noticed a flock of sheep and stopped the car to take&n......"
2、 " There is this guy and this girl and they want to have sex. So they go to the girls house and before entering the girl stops the guy and says.
""My little sister sleeps on the bottom bunk of our bunk bed and I do not want her to know what we are doing, so when I say `baloney` it means push harder, and when I say `pastrami` it means push slower.""
......"
3、 1.What the fuck is going on?(到底他妈的怎么回事?)
通常此话出于黑人之口,且口气最宜为疑惑,不解,愤怒等等。
若是白人则多数时候会说-What the hell is going on?
意义相同而适用于更多场合。
说此话之人身份通常为上级,且相处较久。
不过如果你出差回家时看见老婆身边躺着个赤条条的陌生人,那它可就派上大用场了!
2.You son of bitch! (你个狗娘养的!)
令人意外的是,最爱说这句话的往往是女性。
......
4、 " There is a little boy and a little girl in the woods. The little
girl asked the boy, ""What is a penis?""
The boy replied, ""I don`t know."" At that time he hears his mom
calling him for lunch. He goes home and eats his lunch. Then he
......"
5、 "Doctor, I have an ear ache.
2000 B.C. - ""Here, eat this root.""
1000 B.C. - ""That root is heathen, say this prayer.""
1850 A.D. - ""That prayer is superstition, drink this potion.""
1940 A.D. - ""That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill.""
1985 A.D. - ""That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic.""
......"
6、 " There is a little boy and a little girl in the woods. The little
girl asked the boy, ""What is a penis?""
The boy replied, ""I don`t know."" At that time he hears his mom
calling him for lunch. He goes home and eats his lunch. Then he
......"
7、 "There is this guy and this girl and they want to have sex. So they go to the girls house and before entering the girl stops the guy and says.
""My little sister sleeps on the bottom bunk of our bunk bed and I do not want her to know what we are doing, so when I say `baloney` it means push harder, and when I say `pastrami` it means push slower.""
......"
8、 " A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar: FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST! So the guy asks the bartender what the test is.
Bartender: ""Well, FIRST you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the WHOLE thing at once AND, you can`t make a face while doing it. SECOND, there`s a `gator out back with a sore tooth...you have to remove it with your bare hands. THIRD, there`s a woman up-stairs who`s never had an orgasm. You gotta make things right for her.
......"
9、 "when i was a freshman in our university,one day,our new teacher want us to say sth about yourself then ,a student standed up, and said ""i come from shandong ,and i want to learn more when im in university,and hope good ,good study ,day ,day up.then our teacher&n......"
10、 "your funny story was too overdue. i used to hear about it when i was just a middle school student. have you ever heard about this sentence: "" we brother who and who""?"
11、 What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home
12、 "What is the thinnest book in the world? ""What men know about women."""
13、 "苦命的 salesman An insect repellent salesman tried to sell his product to a farm
英语笑话100篇(2)
a teacher said to her class:”who was the first man?”
一个老师问她的学生:“谁是世界上第一个男人”
“george washington,” a little boy shouted promptly.
一个小男孩立刻大声说:“乔治.华盛顿。”
“how do you make out that george washington was the first man?”asked the teacher,smiling indulgently.
老师带着宠溺的笑容问这个男生:“你如何证明乔治华盛顿是世界上第一个男人呢。”
““he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen.”
这个男孩子说:“因为,他是第一个挑起战争,第一个主张和平,并且是第一个深得民心的人。
英语笑话100篇(3)
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
老师: 这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
学生:我指不出,但我知道答案。
Teacher: Please tell us.
老师:请说说看。
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
学生:燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
英语笑话100篇相关热词搜索:英语笑话
1、英语笑话大全 爆笑篇一《看笑话学英语笑话大全爆笑翻译》1 One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to 英语笑话大全 爆笑。(2015-09-21)
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