英语搞笑剧本 6人

导读：　英语搞笑剧本 6人篇一：六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞 ...

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英语搞笑剧本 6人篇一：六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞

六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞

Wander severy five miles

焦仲卿Johnny (Jforshort) 刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)

焦母Johnny’s mother (JMforshort) 刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)

太守之子Mayor’sson (MSforshort) 强盗Burglars(ABandC)

(Johnny（焦仲卿）作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)

Johnny（焦仲卿）:Everybody says that I’m henpecked,but in fact,I’m as strong as a tiger,(小声)while my wifeis Wu Song. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’m not afraid of you! (内砸出一脸盆, Johnny（焦仲卿）接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’m afraid of whom?

My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me.All this I do not care.I only want her to be tender than me.But she is not!Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell! (内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中Johnny（焦仲卿）)

My God!Who can help me?(下)

Act1

(序幕结束时,作窃听状)

焦母（JM）(拄拐棍上):I can!

(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Where are you?

刘兰芝Lunch (扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’m here!What’s up mum?

焦母（JM）:I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.

刘兰芝 Lunch :OK.My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law,what’s up? 焦母（JM）:Since you married my son you have behaved so badly.You have been so rude,sobrusque,so lazy……

刘兰芝 Lunch :But……

焦母（JM）:Never interrupt me!

刘兰芝 Lunch:Never interrupt me!Since I married your son,that terrible Johnny,I have been working hard all day long,cooking and washing.I have raised ten soft housands of pigs and ducks and chicken and……

焦母（JM）:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!

刘兰芝 Lunch (生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)Goandask your son.I’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在焦母（JM）的脸上,下)

Act2

(焦母（JM）坐在台上打毛线刘兰芝Luch拿着锅铲上)

刘兰芝(Luch):Mum,I’m back!

焦母（JM）:You are back?Why?What happened?

刘兰芝(Luch):I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law. 焦母（JM）(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny,I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor,but you did not listen to me.Look at yourself……

1

刘兰芝(Luch):But,mum……

焦母（JM）:Never interrupt me!

刘兰芝(Luch):Mum,I’m not interrupting you.I just want to tell you that you are always right OK?And I’ll marry whom ever you want me to.

刘母Lunch’smother (大喜):Nice girl!Justnow,I met the mayor’s son in the market.Hesaid:“If your daughter Haven’t been married,I really really want to marry her!”Now you are free again,I’ll go and tell him.(下)

刘兰芝(Luch):What?The mayor’s son?The most famous play boy in the neighbor-hood?(手中的锅 铲掉在地上)What as illy thing I have done!(下)

Act3

(焦仲卿Johnny睡眼惺忪上)

焦仲卿Johnny (边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Where are my socks?

(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Here they are!(闻一下) Er!Howsmelly!They are still dirty! (突然想起)Lunch has gone!I have to wash them myself.

(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’m so hungry!But there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围

裙)This is what Lunch always wears!I miss her so much,and her excellent cooking skill!Now she has gone.I have to cook for my mother and myself.

焦母（JM）:Where’s my breakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’t she got up yet?

焦仲卿Johnny:Mum,can’t you remember?Lunch has gone!

焦母（JM）(沉吟片刻):Well,to tell you the truth Johnny,a son without a wifeisuseless.Lunch is an ice girl,go and take her back!

焦仲卿Johnny(立正敬礼):Yes madam!

Act4

(焦仲卿Johnny开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)

A:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!

The road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)

B:And I planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)

C:If you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)

AB&C:Give us all your money!

焦仲卿Johnny (搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):Is1 mao enough?

(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)

2

A:What bad luck!This guy is broken!

B:If we can notrobany money today,we will have nothing to eat tonight!

C:I heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry Miss Liu Lanzhi next month.WE can go and rob the wedding!

A&B:Good idea!

焦仲卿Johnny (惊讶):What?What?Lunch is going to get married?It’s impossible!

AB&C:Why?A pretty girl and a rich man,what a good couple!

焦仲卿Johnny:But Lunch is my wife!We haven’t got divorced yet!

(突然有了主意)I’ve got an idea!You are going to rob the wedding,don’tyou?I’ll go with you.You take the money and I take the bride.

B:Have you got any experience?

焦仲卿Johnny:No.But I’ve got this!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000) Act5

(转眼已到了婚礼之期．太守之子意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，刘兰芝Luch盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)

(焦仲卿Johnny和三强盗跃至台中)

ABC&焦仲卿Johnny:Heyyou!Stop and listen to us!

A:The road is built by me!

B:And I planted one tree.

C:If you want to go by this street---

焦仲卿Johnny:Give us all your money!

刘兰芝(Luch)听到焦仲卿Johnny的声音，掀起了盖头)

刘兰芝(Luch) (惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到焦仲卿Johnny的身边并躲到了的身后) (太守之子大怒，挥拳向焦仲卿Johnn打来．焦仲卿Johnny矮身一躲，太守之子打中了焦仲卿Johnny身后的刘兰芝(Luch)，刘兰芝(Luch)晕倒)

焦仲卿Johnny (火冒三丈):How dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向太守之子冲去）

(焦仲卿Johnny与太守之子混战，焦母上，以拐杖击晕太守之子)

(焦仲卿Johnn将太守之子胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)

焦仲卿Johnny(扶起刘兰芝(Luch)，关切地问):Honey,how are you?

刘兰芝(Luch)(哭状):I hurt a lot!

焦仲卿Johnny:Don’t cry baby.I’ll go and fetch the medicine. (下)

刘兰芝(Luch) (起身去追):Wait for me! (跑下)

3

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇二：6人英语小品短话剧剧本

6人英语小品短话剧剧本

A(衣衫褴褛） B（衣着光鲜） C小花 D小草 E椅子 F新闻记者

B坐在E上吃东西，A一乞丐上前

A：先生，先生，请给我些面包，谢谢，我饿得不行了。

B：（厌恶）让开，让开。（然后便起身离开，这时他的钱包掉到E上头了）

A：先生，先生（A看见后，立即拾起，追上了走远的B）

B：让开，让开啊，我没吃的了，也没钱了（看也不看A，仍自顾自地走了）

C：他真愚蠢啊

D：是啊是啊（D点头附和）

A：可„„先生„„您听我说„„（仍拉着B衣服的后摆）

B：挖，你这人怎么这么讨厌！（还是没有回头看A一眼）

C：椅子啊，你会不会觉得刚刚坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？

E：唉，人总是这么愚蠢啊~~~~

D：是啊是啊

与此同时A与B还在纠缠，这时E终于隐忍不住爆发了。

E：先生！你的钱包丢了！你怎么这么傻啊。

A与B同时回头，看见了那会说话的椅子E，吓昏过去了。这一幕恰巧被经过的F看见了。于是F就报道了这一事件。

F：大家好，我是新闻记者F，今天我看见了一个奇异的现象，一个椅子说话了，两个人被吓昏了，下面我将采访一下被吓昏的两个人。

B：哦，上帝，哦，妈妈。

F：这个人傻了，我们不鸟他了，下面我采访一下另一个人吧，请问你为什么不告诉他，他的钱包丢了？

A：对不起，我不知道“钱包”这个单词怎么讲„„

F：通过这一事件，我们可以认识到，掌握一门外语的重要性，以及金钱给人类带来的影响。是吗，椅子？

E：是啊，是啊（E傻傻地拼命点头）

C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他们弄傻了。

D：谁让这是一个童话呢„„

为了配合马可的英文翻译，所以台词能简单就简单啦。下面是马可的英文翻译。

A:sir,sir,please give me a piece of bread.thank you,sir.I'm hungry to die.

B:get away,get away,dirty man.

A:sir,sir!!

B:run away,please run away.I have no food,and I don't have money,either.

C:hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?

D:yes,yes.

A:but....sir....please listen to me.....

B:wa,why are you so disgusting!!

C:hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.

E:ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.

D:yes,yes!!

E:sir!you lost your wallet!can't you be more clever?

F:good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to faint.now,I will intenview the two nozzy man.

B:wo,my god,wo,my,mum.

F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been mad.we needn't take notice of him.let me interview the other man,hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?

A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "钱包" in english......

F:dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect us.is that all right,chair?

E:yes,yes. （本文来自天空剧本网 ）

C:ai,men is so silly.

D:don't believe us,it is just a fairly tale.

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇三：6人英语话剧剧本《逃课》

Skipping Class

6人剧本。《逃课》，绝对适合大学生的剧本，讲述逃课的故事。

Cast

Anita: Never understands why students like to skip classes

p classes but dares not to do it

Jason: Always commits himself not to skip classes

Steven: Always gives himself a good excuse for skipping class

Rita: A professional class skipper

铸造

安妮塔：不明白为什么学生喜欢逃课

P课却不敢去做

杰森：总是把自己不逃课

史提芬：总是给自己一个好理由逃课

丽塔：一个专业课队长

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Scene I

(Anita, Kevin, Ken, Jason, Steven, and Rita are all Tunghai University students. They are good friends. One day, Ken and Jason meet on the way to the classroom.)

Ken: Why are you late? And, you just missed the last class.（安妮塔，凯文，杰森，肯，史提芬，和丽塔都是东海大学的学生。他们是好朋友。有一天，肯恩和杰森相遇在去教室的路上。）

肯：你为什么迟到？而且，你只是错过了最后一班。

（安妮塔，凯文，杰森，肯，史提芬，和丽塔都是东海大学的学生。他们是好朋友。有一天，肯恩和杰森相遇在去教室的路上。）

肯：你为什么迟到？而且，你只是错过了最后一班。Ken: Sure if you give me a good reason why you missed the class. You promised me that you would be in class on time today.

肯：如果你给我一个好理由你为什么错过了上课。你答应我，你今天会准时上课。 Jason: Believe me, I would like to keep my word. The problem is that I have the “Business Management” test today and I was up studying for it till three o’clock this morning. Then I fell asleep and woke up at ten o’clock this morning.

杰森：相信我，我愿意遵守我的道。问题是，我有“企业管理”的考验今天我是学习它直到今天早上三点。然后我睡着了，醒来在早上十点。

Ken: You studied until three o’clock this morning? Why? What did you do yesterday afternoon? I know you were free from four o’clock on yesterday. 肯：你学习到凌晨三点？为什么呢？你昨天下午在做什么？我知道你是免费的从四点昨天。

Jason: Well, I met one of my very old friends on line and we just talked too long…杰森：嗯，我遇见了我的一个老朋友在线和我们聊天的时间太长了„ Ken: For God’s sake! Don’t you care about next week’s mid-term examination?

肯：看在上帝的份上！下周你不在乎的期中考试吗？

英语剧本大全

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Scene II

(Anita, Steven and Kevin are talking to one another in front of a classroom. And, Anita is trying to prevent Steven and Kevin from cutting the next class.) 安妮塔，史提芬和凯文正在谈论彼此在教室前面。而且，安妮塔试图阻止史提芬和凯文从切割下一级。）

Anita: Hey, we’ll have the “Business Management” class in a few minutes. Where are you going? Don’t tell me that you are going安妮塔：嘿，我们会有“企业管理”课在几分钟。你去哪儿？别告诉我你要跟杰森争论。 to argue with Jason.

Steven: I will do anything for my good friend. Of course I am going to argue with the guy who gave my good friend a hard time.

史提芬：我会做任何事，因为我的好朋友。当然，我会跟那个给我的好朋友很难。 Anita: You always like to get involved in someone else’s business. You’ll get yourself in trouble. Don’t you know it? ...

安妮塔：你总是喜欢介入别人的事。你会惹上麻烦。你不知道吗？„

Kevin: Anita, don’t be upset with him. He will not listen to you. Just leave him alone. By the way, I am still waiting for your decision. Are you coming with me to the concert tomorrow?

凯文：安妮塔，别跟他生气。他不会听你的。只留下他一个人。顺便说一下，我依然等待你的决定。明天你跟我一起去听音乐会吗？

Anita: Oh, I am sorry that I almost forgot it. What time tomorrow? 安妮塔：哦，我很抱歉，我差点忘了。明天什么时候？

Kevin: Two o’clock. I cannot wait to see my adorable superstar – Jolin. Oh, how wonderful!

凯文：二点。我不能等着看我的可爱的超级巨星–蔡依林。哦。多好啊！ Anita: wait a minute. We have Calculus class tomorrow afternoon. Are you out of your安妮塔：等一等。我们明天下午有数学课。你疯了吗？mind?

Kevin: Well, I’m not. Yet I think we can just copy the notes from someone else.

Anita: No, this is a very important class. And you would never understand it without凯文：嗯，我不。但我认为我们可以抄笔记从别人

安妮塔：不，这是一个非常重要的一类。你永远不会了解它没有听讲座。listening to the lecture.

Kevin: To me it makes no difference. Even if I were in the class I would never understand what the teacher is talking about. Besides, who likes to look at the old baldhead? 凯文：对我来说没有区别。即使我在班上我不理解老师在讲什么。此外，谁喜欢看老秃头？

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Scene III

(After Calculus class, Anita is on the way to the ST building. At the same time, Rita is walking to the ST building from the dorm. They meet in front of the laboratory.) （在微积分课程，安妮塔正前往圣建筑。同时，丽塔走到圣建筑从宿舍。他们满足实验室前面。）

Rita: Here I am. Look, I did what I promised. I am a good girl, not skipping classes. 丽塔：我在这里。看，我做到了我的承诺。我是一个好女孩，不逃课

Anita: What are you talking about? This is the 5th class. You skipped the first four classes this morning. Yesterday you promised that you would not skip any class.

安妮塔：你在说什么？这是第五班。你跳过了今天早上的第一班四。昨天你保证你不会跳过任何班

Rita: Did I? We don’t have any class in the morning but we’re packed in the afternoon on Wednesdays. 丽塔：真的吗？我们没有在上午上课但是我们装在星期三下午

Anita: I beg your pardon? Today is Thursday and we have classes the whole day. Besides, didn’t you meet us this morning while we were going out to class?

安妮塔：请你原谅我？今天是星期四，我们班的一天。此外，你早上没接我们去上课吗？

Rita: I thought you were going to the library.

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Scene IV

(Ken and Rita are talking to each other. They are talking about how to skip a

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇四：搞笑大学6人剧本

搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》 搞笑5人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》 演员表：

西门吹雪

叶孤城

花满楼

king

旁白

道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠

旁白：A quiet villageis covered with white snow .

Bird sare dancing in the cold .

Amanis walking along the street ,step by step .

Wind is coming in silence.

Another my sterious man approaches . Y与X相遇．

X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you ! Y:Haha, Never mind baybay.

X:Excuse me， who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?

Y:ha ha ,I won’t change my name! No matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you? X:I am xi men chui xue.

Y惊讶:Ar, xi men chui xue?

X:Yes,what is wrong?

Y:I heard that you are the besting MartialArts?

X:Great, you know me !

Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me you go!

X:No, I must kill you !

Y:I don‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t want to be killed.There are a eighty-year-old mothe and a three-yearold son to be looked after by me!

X:No way! Because we are fighting now! youk now?

Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t force me!

X:Pardon!

(Y拿出一袋牛奶)

X抢过牛奶:milk, very good! I like drinking it. How do you know that?

Y:please drink it!

X喝完牛奶:Thanks, ha,ha

Y:Do you still want to kill me?

X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.

Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good! Very good! I hope you will not for get what you said!? X:I’m sure I won’t!

Y:I must give you alesson! I fIdon‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t be at your this time, you’ll never behave properly!3-2-1-0! X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !

Y大笑：Ha Ha……

X可怜状: help! help! Where is the washroom?

Y:What ?

X:To liet?

Y:What ?

X:The ―WC‖?

Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see acorssing road! X:Thanks,bye bye.

Y掏出纸屑吹:This is genuirne snow! H:Stop!Protecting the environment is abasicobligation!

Y:Who are you?

H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?

Y:Yes, he was beatenbymeandisin―WC‖ now,ha……

H惊讶:Nowyouarethebestintheworld!

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇五：五人英语短剧剧本The Lost Youth(迷失的青春)与4人至6人英语话剧剧本Be a Good Lover剧本

五人英语短剧剧本-The Lost Youth(迷失的青春)

这是一个五人英语短剧剧本，剧本简短，但是情节生动！

人物:Jack Sean Kevin Claire Kiki

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Scene I

(In the classroom)

Sean Hi! How are you

Kevin Bad! Really bad!

Sean Do you want to try something to make you feel happy

Kevin OK! Do you have any ideas

Sean I know a pub which is popular.

Kevin Oh! Sounds great!

Sean Hm! Let’s go right now.

Sean You looked so blue recently. I have something good. It can make you feel high.

Kevin If I take that, how will I feel

Sean You will forget everything that bothers you, and you will feel so carefree.

Kevin Won’t there be danger

Sean Trust me! I can sell drugs to you if you want to try some!

Kevin But…but I have no money.

Sean Don’t worry! You can be a drug dealer. It’s a good business.

Kevin Hm…But…

Sean Take it easy. Let’s take some drugs to make us happy tonight!

Kevin OK…

(Sean and Kevin go to the pub)

Kevin Oh! So relaxing! Do you have any extra drugs

Sean No, but we can earn money by selling drugs, and use the money to buy more.

Kevin Really It’s a good idea.

Sean That’s right. But I don’t know who I can sell to.

Kevin It’s a big problem.

Sean Oh! I have an idea! I have two friends. Maybe they will buy them.

Kevin Hm…Let’s try.

Sean Let me call my friends.

Kevin I can lend you my cell-phone.

(On the phone)

Sean Hey! This is Sean, Where are you

Kiki I’m in the dormitory.

Sean I want to show you something wonderful.

Kiki What

Sean I can’t tell you now. It’s a secret. Come and I’ll show you.

Kiki Let me think.

Sean I’ll wait for you. Don’t hesitate. Hurry up! Bye!

(Sean turns off the phone)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene Ⅱ

(Kiki and Claire are in the dormitory.)

Kiki Sean called me!

Claire What happened

Kiki They went to a pub. It is noisy there.

Claire Oh! Pub. I always hear bad news about pubs from TV.

Kiki Yes, me too. I don’t know what they are doing there. Sean tells me he wants to show something to us.

Claire What What’s that

Kiki I don’t know. He said it’s a secret.

Claire It’s very strange.

Kiki Claire, I have a bad feeling, they might be doing something illegal. They might be using drugs. Claire Oh! I don’t believe it.

Kiki I’m just guessing.

Claire But maybe it’s true.

Kiki If they take drugs, they will get addicted. They might take drugs again and again.

Claire And they will spend a lot of money on buying drugs.

Kiki What will they do if they do not have money

Claire They might rob a bank.

Kiki If they rob a bank…

Claire They will be arrested.

Kiki If they are arrested…

Claire Their parents will be very sad, and we will lose two good friends.

Kiki I can’t imagine how serious it will be.

Claire Me, either.

Kiki So… we should go find them, and tell them how serious it is.

Claire Wait… It’s all our imagination. Maybe they just go to the pub to make friends with beautiful girls. And I think it’s dangerous for us to go to the pub by ourselves.

Kiki Oh! I don’t know. We won’t understand what’s going on unless we are there. Maybe they are… in a dangerous situation.

Claire Mm…, I am also worried.

Kiki Okay! I think we should go there to see what’s going on there. If they are safe, we can come back quickly. If they do something they shouldn’t do, we’ll bring them back. Don’t leave them there.

Claire Okay! Let’s go.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene III

(Sean, Kevin, Kiki and Clair in a pub)

Sean Hello! Let’s relax all night.

Kiki What are you doing now You are taking pills.

Kevin You are over reacted. Don’t worry.

Claire I think it’s so dangerous. Kiki, let’s go right now.

Kiki That’s right, I also feel scared.

Claire Me too.

(Kiki and Clair got out of the pub)

Kevin Oh! They are gone.

Sean Don’t worry about it. Let’s go on relaxing.

(Bi! A lot of policemen enter the pub.)

Police Freeze!

Sean Oh! Terrible things happened.

Police You are taking illegal drugs.

Sean They are not dangerous. They make me comfortable.

Police Don’t you know the drugs will destroy your health

Sean Really! But I didn’t feel bad or sick.

Police Drugs create hallucination for people who take them. If you try once, you will be addicted to them. Without them, you will be sick and sometimes you will even hurt yourself. It’s not a smart thing to do.

Kevin I really feel unhappy at school. I usually got bad grades. My mother always criticizes me. My girlfriend broke up with me last month. (Crying………)

Police I really sympathize at you, but you can do something healthier to help you feel good about yourself, like doing sports, or traveling. They are good for both your body and mind.

Sean Sorry. I made a mistake. I shouldn’t sell drugs for my friends.

Police It is not too late to quit using. And you can start a new life.

Kevin It’s really a bad experience in my life. I wouldn’t take drugs anymore. I shouldn’t run away from my problems.

Sean I feel the same way as you do.

Police Go to the police station with me. (Sean and Kevin are arrested.)

4人-6人英语话剧剧本Be a Good Lover

Be a Good Lover

又是关于爱情的。爱情是一个永恒的话题，不分国界、年龄（？）、、、你是不是一个good lover？

人物

Vicky

Benson

Greta

Andy

Marcell & Ken

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene I

(One day, Andy and Benson went to a meeting. In the meeting, they met a pretty girl — Marcell. And then, Andy fell in love with Marcell.)

Andy: Benson, I think that I am falling in love with Marcell.

Benson: Oh, My God. You have already had a girlfriend, Greta. How can you have another girlfriend? Andy: What should I do?

Benson: I don’t know… Andy, may I ask you a question?

Andy: Sure!

Benson: Do you love Marcell more than Greta?

Andy: I am not sure.

Benson: Oh, no. I think that you love Marcell more than Greta.

Andy: Maybe. Benson, could you do me a favor?

Benson: What?

Andy: Please keep it as a secret, and don’t tell Greta and Vicky about it.

Benson: Well…all right. But you won’t be able to hide it forever.

Andy: I know.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene II

(After few days, Benson could not tolerate what Andy did anymore. Finally, Benson decided that he should tell Vicky about it.)

Benson: Vicky…

Vicky: What?

Benson: I want to tell you something.

Vicky: OK, I am all ears.

Benson: Andy is falling in love with Marcell.

Vicky: Oh, my god… I cannot believe it.

Benson: But I think that Andy can choose his lover. Maybe he doesn’t love Greta anymore.

Vicky: I disagree with you.

Benson: Why?

Vicky: Andy should treat Greta with faithfulness.

Benson: I don’t think so. He has the right to choose whom he likes most.

Vicky: So what can Greta do?

Benson: She can have another boyfriend.

Vicky: Are you sure? She loves Andy so much. I don’t think she would love someone else. Benson: Let’s see what will happen.

Vicky: All right, I don’t want to argue about it anymore. I want to go home.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene III

(When Vicky knows that Andy is falling in love with Marcell. She decides that she should tell Greta about it.) Vicky: Greta, I want to tell you an unbelievable thing.

Greta: What’s it?

Vicky: Well, Andy is falling in love with another girl.

Greta: You are kidding.

Vicky: I’m not kidding you. I’m serious.

Greta: I don’t think that Andy should love another girl.

Vicky: I know what you mean. But it’s true.

Greta: I want to get Andy back. What should I do now?

Vicky: I don’t know. But if I were you, I would break up with Andy.

Greta: But I love Andy so much and I can’t live without him.

Vicky: Maybe you can try to forget Andy. After a while, you will forget everything about him. Greta: Maybe. But now I want to calm down myself.

Vicky: Ok. If you need someone to talk to, I am always by your side.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene IV

(Greta phones to Andy presently. She is very sad and angry.)

Greta: May I speak with Andy, please?

Andy: This is Andy speaking.

Greta: I was told that you are falling in love with Marcell. Is it true?

Andy: Who told you about it? Oh! I know. It’s Vicky, right?

Greta: You don’t have to know who told me about it. But just tell me it is true or not.

Andy: It is true. I love Marcell. I am sorry.

Greta: I love you so much. I can give anything you want. Why did you betray me?

Andy: Greta, calm down, please.

Greta: Ha! My boyfriend loves another girl. How can I calm down? I want to break up with you right now.

Andy: Ok, do as your wish.

Greta: I don’t want to see you anymore.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene V

(Andy and Marcell went to see a romantic movie. They talked with each other happily. They were on the way to Marcell’s place.)

Marcell: Well, what do you think about the movie?

Andy: I think that is a good movie.

Marcell: You are right. But the actor died of saving his country finally.

Andy: Don’t be sad. That’s just a movie.

Marcell: I know.

Andy: Next time I will take you to a place to see the stars. The scenery is beautiful.

Marcell: Ok. When can I see you again?

Andy: Tomorrow. At 6:00 pm.

(As soon as Marcell arrived home, she made a phone call.)

Marcell: May I speak with Ken, please?

Ken: This is Ken speaking.

Marcell: Honey, I just arrived home. I’m so tired.

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇六：爱的旋律( The rhythm of love)-英语话剧6人剧本

爱的旋律 The rhythm of love

Actors:

X: wang xun

J: ji yaling

W:wu yueling

D:ding chihong

Y:yang yi

Z:zhu jiayi

（总道具：一个可以撕页的卡）

第一幕：

道具：凳子两个，棒棒糖。

人物：x j w

(j and w 唱歌入场 歌曲未定)

(j and w 唱完后 找个凳子坐下 做聊天状)

x: today ,there is a dance party ,I join in and want to find my girl !! where are you, my girl !!!(手势动作)

(x走到w面前端详， 当w伸出手以为要请她跳舞时候，x马上跳到J面前,给棒棒糖, 唱老鼠爱大米英文版,然后两人到台前)

X: I have fell in love with you !

J: it’s too rapid! I can’t confront it .

X: ok! Shall we try to live some day to be suitable to each other?

J: although I admit you are a food boy, but…

X: ok.so much for today . I will send text messages to you tonight, wait for me , my sweet!

J:…….

(x j退下 w起身 上前走一步，先回头张望（背景音乐响起）) W: not every one you loved is suitable to you, and you will lose a chance to get a better one.. I will be waiting for you until I change my mind….(语速变缓)

第二幕：

道具：凳子两个，大衣一件（先放在地上），饭盒一个，英语书。

人物：x w j

(w先进来，带上饭盒 放在x的座位上，恋恋不舍离开并一边回头张望，然后坐到自己位置上，拿起书看）

(x入场，先是看到了饭盒，很奇怪，端起）

X： it’s strange! Yueling,is it yours?

W: no ! it’s yours.

X: ok that’s fine . no matter who it belongs , I’m hungry now , eating is a good choice.

(j进来，看到x在吃饭)

J: is it delicious? Wish you have a good time!

(j然后走开 走到门外)

(x 走向前台 指着J)

X: it’s she bring the food! she is concerned about me！！ (高兴状，然后回去， 睡觉了)

(w看到x睡觉了就偷偷摸摸的过去，给他加衣服，此时j在门口进来 刚好看到)

(w做出可爱状 恋恋不舍状，慢慢走开 碰到j）

W: hi yaling!

J: hi yueling! Nice to meet you .

(w急急忙忙走开，j走进去，回了回头 很用力的砸书，x被惊醒)

第三幕：

道具: 纸做的棒子一个，木棒子一个，水桶（纸做的也可以）， 新华字典，新华字典书皮，大话西游草稿。

（西游记音乐）

Z: hi, boy! It looks like you have lost your girl friend, right? X: yes . how do you get to know?

Z: 贫道..

Y: first blood! (打z….)

Z: 贫僧 come from china! I’m the master of buddhism.

X: I know you! You have three students: a monkey a pig and a monster 。it’s you 去西天取经

Z: no ! not 去西天取经，but 去西天拜堂成亲。

(x做出惊讶状)

Z: I have a good book only sold ten yuan … do you want to get one?

X: 葵花宝典？

Z: no no no .. 新华字典！！！(撕下书皮)

Once upon a time ,there was a ture love in front of me , I did”t cherish it,if I was to meet him again,I wish to say I love you.if you would ask me how long I would love him,I would say ten thousands years. That man is you the only man I love in this world is you .only you(sing)

Y: stop! Double kill! (并打z…) Wangxun, listen carefully and then anwser the questions, do you like eating pork?

X: yes! It’s my favourite!

Y: tripe kill !! (并打x…) I’m 猪八戒 , the most clever beautiful handsome bright pig in the world!!!

Z: 八戒！ I persuade you many times that you not play too many computer games ! especially 魔兽争霸 and dota!!

Y: I had a girl called 嫦娥… I have a dream that one day this love will rise up ,it’s a dream deeply rooted in the dream! Oh !!嫦娥！！！ I miss you !!!!

X: oh??? 高翠莲 is there.

Y: where? Where? 翠莲！！I’m coming!!

(y马上跑了过去，z追了过去 边喊 八戒！八戒！)

X: a silly pig. My classmates had three girl friends called 嫦娥.

第四幕：紧箍

（j D上场）

J: chihong, I’m your girl friend now. tomorrow, would you love me as today

D: oh my silly girl, why would you say so ? I’m a man with responsibility, you are my first girl !

J: chihong, I trust you forever…….

(j d 开始拿到 冰激凌的盒子 d喂j吃 此时 x上场 做四处张望状)

X: yaling! Where are you !! you are my girl !

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇七：英语六人话剧

Figure: mother ( M ) son David( S ) girlfriend Linda ( G ) roommate A roommates roommate C B

The first scene

[场景：舞台的中央摆著一条长凳。G做在长凳上，东张西望，不断的看表，自言自语：“怎么还不来？”离开长凳，来回走动，然后又坐下。]

David: Linda!

S：（身穿名牌时装）琳达！

Linda: ( up to one side does not speak )

G：（身子转到一边不说话）

David: Linda, what is wrong with you?

S：琳达，你怎么了？

Linda: Haven’t we already agreed meet at 7 o’clock ? You should look at what time it is now ? You have already late for seven minutes and seven seconds !

G：（转向S用手指著手表）不是说好七点钟不见不散吗？你看看现在几点了？你晚了整整七分又七秒！

David: I was wrong, I was sorry, okay? Such things will not happen again. S：（陪上笑脸）我错了，我错了，行吗？下不为例，下不为例。

Linda: Well, look at your genuine’s sake, forgive you this time, but, today you have to go shopping with me,?

G：好吧，看在你态度诚恳的份上，就原谅你这一次吧，不过，今天你要陪我去逛超市，怎么样？

David: the supermarket?

S：逛超市？（略一迟疑）

Linda: How ? You don't want to?

G：怎么？你不愿意？

David: how can that be? However, I want to go to the park. There is beautiful the weather of today is good, Why not go for a walk?

S：怎么会呢？不过，还是去公园吧。那里风景好，而且今天天气也不错，去散散布多好啊。

Linda : You want to go to the park again? The day before yesterday just went? G：又要去公园啊？前天不是刚去过吗？

David: OK, OK, let's go shopping in the supermarket. Can you wait me for a while? I need to go back to the dormitory to get any money.

S：那好，那好，咱们逛超市。你等会儿，我回宿舍拿点钱。（转身要走） Linda: No, my body with money. Let 's go.

G：不用了，我身上带这钱呢。走吧。

David: what? You go out with me, how can I spend your money. Besides, this money means nothing for me , my family 's got plenty of money. You wait here for me, I’ll back soon

S：那哪行呢？你跟我一起出去，哪能让你花钱。再说了，这点钱算什么，我家里有的是钱。你在这等我，我这就上去拿。

Linda: See, here you come again. Your mouth shut up rich, open rich. This will let others think you and I together is to money?

G：（生气的说）你看，你又来了。你张嘴有钱，闭嘴有钱，人家还以为我是

冲著你的钱才和你在一起的呢？

David: All right. I was wrong? I was wrong again! But I sincerely, that money do not in my eyes!

S：好吧。我错了，我又错了。不过说实在的，这点钱我真不放在眼里！ Linda： you,. G：

你……（很生气的）

David: sorry, sorry, I do not say it again, I promise! Hey, your birthday is coming ,Why not take this opportunity to pick your birthday gift! You should not want me to take your money to buy a gift for you birthday

S：对不起，对不起，我不说了，我不说了。哎，你的生日快到了，正好借今天这个机会我去给你买件生日礼物！你总不能让我拿著你的钱给你买生日礼物吧。 Linda: well! I am here for you, you should come back soon!

G：（犹豫了一会）那好吧！我在这等你，你快去快回！

The second scene

[场景：舞台上摆了一张床，上面凌乱的堆放了一些衣物，床下有一盆，一侧有一圆桌，舍友A B C团坐打扑克，叫牌声不断！B上场。很匆忙。做开门动作。进门后开始在床上翻东西。]

A: Hey, David, and your dating end so soon?

A：（一边打牌一边说）哎，小刚，跟女朋友约会这么快就回来了？

David: how can it be，ah! She asked me to accompany her to the supermarket! You know I can't let her pay! Besides I don't care the money! I just back to get any money! S：（继续翻东西）哪能呀！她要我陪她逛超市！你说我总不能让她掏钱吧！再说这点钱我也不在乎！这不我回来再拿点钱

B: David your home really rich?

B：小刚你家里真的很有钱吗？

David: of course!

S：（停下动作，对著A B C，满脸认真的）那是当然！（继续翻）

C: David, since your home is rich, why do you still eat steamed bread and pickle everyday?

C：小刚，既然你家里那么有钱，那你为什么还整天吃馒头咸菜呢？

David: don't mention it, at home my mother forced me to eat meat every day, I was sick! Now see them on the nausea!

S：别提了，家里我妈天天逼我吃大鱼大肉，我都吃腻了！现在一见到它们就反胃！

A B C: oh ... ...

A B C：噢……

The third scene

M: young man, do you know where David lives?

M：（头上包著头巾，跨著一个篮子，里面装著花生，穿著土气。M远远的看见了P，连忙上前去）小伙子，你知道赵小刚住在哪里吗？

P: David? I was his classmate. What’s the relationship between you and him? P：S？我是他同学，你是他什么人？

M: I'm his mother I came from the countryside , in order to see my son, my son, I promise, from learning is good, is the first admitted to such a good university in our

village ! Young man, where he lives?

M：我是他母亲（P一脸惊鄂）我从乡下来，来看我儿子，我那儿子，真有出息，从小学习就好，是我们村里第一个考上这么好的大学！小伙子，他住哪儿？ P: he lived in the building, third floor, room 303!

P：（楞了半晌，手指指著一栋楼，结结巴巴）他住那栋楼，3楼，303房间！ M: Thank you.

M：谢谢。（转身向那栋楼走去，P目视她走向那栋楼）

The fourth scene

C: ( B ) do not patronize their speaking, it 's your turn to deal.

C：（拉B）别光顾着说话，该你出牌了。 （电话响，S接）

David: Hey, ah, ah I back right now, Linda, go, ok, I know. Guys, can you lend me any money, these days I am little lack of money；, do me a favor, please.

S：喂，啊，欣然啊，我呆会就下去，哎，我知道。（放下电话，迟疑了一会，满脸堆笑，转向A B C）哥儿几个今天能不能支援一下，这几天我手头比较紧张，帮帮忙吧。

A: you,?

A：你？

B: to borrow money?

B：借钱？

C: no?

C：不会吧？

A: Did you said your money to remit your card a few days ago?

A：你不是说这几天你妈刚在你存折上打了钱吗？

David: Yeah, yeah, these days the bank is hanging the work system, money is not played.

S：是啊，是啊，这几天我们家那边银行更换工作系统，钱打不上。

The fifth scene

（M敲门，S应声开门，见到M大吃一惊，迅速将她拉至门外

David: Mom, why do you come here?

S：妈，你怎么到这来了？

M: mom miss you so much, and over to see you.

M：妈妈想你了呗，就来看你了。（往里走，S拉住）

A: David, who is?

A：S，是谁呀？

David: no, nobody .

S：（忙应声）没，没人。（M趁机进屋）

M: Oh, Oh, These must be your classmates! The boy is spirit ! Eat peanuts for our own , big and sweet!

M：哎呀，（四顾，看到A B C热情上前）哎呀，这是同学吧！小伙子真精神！（抓出篮子里的花生分给A B C）来吃花生。我家里自己种的，又大又香！

（A BC莫名其妙）

M: Studying far from home is not easy for you, everybody should take care of each

other, right? Eating peanuts, help yourself peanut.

M：在外头上学都挺不容易的，大伙多互相照应者点，别客气，吃花生，吃花生。（M说话同时电话响，S忙接）

Linda: why don't you come down? You do not come down, I will go!

G：你怎么还不下来啊？你还不下来，我就要上去了哦！

David: I'll go down, no, no, you don’t come up.

S：我马上下去，不，不，你可千万别上来

Linda: Why will there is the voice of a woman?

G:怎么会有女人的声音呢？

David: what? The woman? Ah, ah, she is just a saler!

S:什么？女人？啊，啊，是个推销的！（挂电话，擦汗）

M: Oh, your pillow towel almostly catch up with your father’s towel wipe feet of cloth. Let me help you to wash!

M：哎呀，你的枕巾都快赶上你父亲的擦脚布了。我帮你拿去洗洗！（从床底下找出盆，装上若干衣物，准备出门）

B: who is that?

B：这是谁呀？（问S）

David: that is, it is ... ...

S：这是，这是……

M: you this boy, how don’t you to speak? I was his mother.

M:你这孩子，怎么不说话呢？（对A B C）我是他妈妈

David: no, no ... ... mother, you don't understand!

S：（忙拉住M抢话）不，不……（将M拉到一旁）妈妈，你不懂！

M: you this boy, I'm your mother, you are my son, who knows you if I don't?

M：（惊奇的）你这孩子，我是你妈妈，你是我生的，我不懂谁懂？（电话响，S撇下M，忙接）

Linda: Why are you so slow, the car is coming.

G:你怎么这么慢，车要来了

David: what? The cars coming? You don't come up! I'll go down right now! S：什么？车快来了？你千万别上来呀！我马上下去！

M: the child!

M：（叹了口气）这孩子！（转身要去洗衣服）

C: is this your mother?

C：这就是你妈？

David: no, not, this, this is my mother, my mother hired her to send me something ... ...

S：（结巴，为难的）不，不，这，这是我妈，我妈雇来给我送东西的……（A B C凑在一起小声议论，G打手机上楼，电话响，无人接听，G行至门口止住） A: this woman is his mother? His mother is not general manager? Hire someone to send a thing also cannot hire so vulgar!

A：这人是他妈？他妈不是总经理吗？雇人来送东西也不能雇这么粗熟的呀！ B: I think David nine out of ten bragging. Vanity to show off, no wonder he eat steamed bread and pickles also borrow money!

B：我看S十有八九在吹牛。爱慕虚荣摆阔气，怪不得他吃馒头咸菜还要借钱呢

C: shh ... ... don't say like that. Nobody knows what was happen, that will hurt the students feelings.

C：嘘……这种事不要乱说，谁也不明白怎么回事，这样说会伤害同学的感情的。（互相打小动作）

（M似乎听到他在说什么，楞了半天，失手盆落地。不知所措，退了几步，拦在B面前）

M: don't, don't criticize the child! I ... ... .. I'm a worker, which his mother hired to give him something, his mother want me to talk to him, Don't be afraid to eat in school. The child was thrifty, and a good child. His mother said, let alone the home is, if not, also will afford his university education! I go to the laundry. Oh, yes, there is some money here, is my ... ... ... ... is his mother let me send David

M：不要，不要批评这孩子！我……..我是他妈妈雇佣的给他送东西的工人，（转身拾衣服）他妈妈要我对他说，在学校里不要不舍得吃。这孩子从小就俭省，是个好孩子。他妈妈说，别说家里有条件，哪怕没有，也要供他上大学！我去洗衣服了。噢，对了，这里有些钱，是我…………是他妈妈让我送来给S的。（手颤抖，掏钱给S）（说完抹眼泪，拿著盆子要去洗衣服 ，S失神的听著，转身给M跪下，抱住M的腿，垂头，目光呆滞，眼含泪花。）

David: mother ..

S：（大声喊）妈妈…（M上前抱住S，A B C哑然默默注视母子二人哭泣） M: child, remember! We were poor, but we couldn’t have no ambition, as long as the backbone, there is no need to afraid of others’ despise, study well in the future rise head and shoulders above others, put the poor hat off!

M：（语重心长）孩子啊，记住！我们穷，但是我们不能志短，只要有骨气，就不怕别人瞧不起，好好念书将来出人头地，把这个穷帽子摘了！（S含泪点头，G出场，慢慢走向S，S看见G

Linda: have you heard ... ...

S：欣然，你都听到了……（刚要说，G抢著说）

Linda: yeah I also saw what had happened. and I also understand, that's aunt. I told you I admire you but not the other, I know you are good to me, and pay a lot in order to make me happy, but I want to tell you, even though you have nothing now, I believe that with you talent, you will do something previously unexpected.

G：（注视著S，娓娓道来）我刚才都看见了，我也明白了，（走向M）这就是伯母吧。（扶著M，对B说）我早说过我欣赏的是你的人而不是其他的，我知道你是真心对我好，我也知道你为了让我开心付出了很多，但有一点我要告诉你，即使你现在一无所有，但是我相信凭借你的才华，你将来一定会有所作为的。（S感动，止住哭泣，看著G，G与B扶起M，面向A B C

David: This is my mother, my mother !

S：这就是我妈，（语重地）我亲妈！

（S与G共同搀扶M沉重，慢慢的走，S突然又一次跪倒大叫一声：“妈！”）

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇八：『英语知识小品6

抢注网址：

A Giraffe that Did Not Believe in Himself

In Africa I heard a story about a giraffe that did not believe in himself．

The giraffe's mother bad left him when he was a few days old because she couldn't feed him． For three years he lived in the warden's house and played with the children．Then he grew too large for the house．

The family decided that he should return to his fellows．They took him to join a herd of wild giraffes．

One look was enough for the giraffe's small brain．He could not believe that such extraordinary animals existed．Or that he was one of them！He turned and bolted．

The family took him back several times．In the end they gave up．Now their giraffe lives by himself near the warden's house．

7．一头不相信自己的长颈鹿

在非洲，我曾听到过关于一头不相信自己形体的长颈鹿的故事。

这头长颈鹿出生后没几天，母鹿因无法喂养它而离去。三年中，它一直住在管理人的家中并与管理人的孩子们一起玩耍。后来，它长得太大了，房子里再也容不下它了。

管理人一家决定让它回到它的伙伴中去。他们把它送到了一群野鹿之中。

这头长颈鹿只看了一眼，它那小小的头脑就受不了啦。它无法相信世上竟有这种异常动物，更难以相信自己还是其中的一员。于是它转身狂逃。

洛基国际英语

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这家人把它送回去好几次，最后只好作罢。现在，他们饲养的这只长颈鹿独自生活在离他们家房子不远的地方。

“成千上万人疯狂下载。。。。。。

更多价值连城的绝密英语学习资料，

洛基内部秘密英语，技巧，策略

请在 网上 申请报名”

洛基国际英语

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英语搞笑剧本 6人篇九：英语六人话剧

麦子，名兜，字仲肥，生卒年不详。是我国一位极次要、极次要的思想家发明家。

据说他的发明包括电饭煲、电热水炉、电蚊香，还有电鼻毛机。但是都因为一时忘记了发明电，所以他的发明品都放在家里，一无所用。

无影脚也是他发明的。他还发明了隐型眼镜和隐型裤袜。不过都因为没有人看得见，所以未能列入史册。

全世界第一个电话也是麦子仲肥制造的，又因为全世界的第二个电话，要到十九世纪未，才由美国人贝尔制造出来，所以麦子坐在全世界第一个电话旁等啊，等啊，等啊„„

一直等到他死的那一天，他的电话都从来没响过。

在麦子仲死了几百年之后，在长江支流往南的下方的下方的下方，就是珠江三角尖了，就在这个尖尖的尖尖，也就是香港大角嘴，我们找到了可能是，麦子仲肥的第十八代后人——麦兜。

“妈妈，什么是第十八代后人呀？”

“啊„，就是你爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸，生了你爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸，生了你爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸，生了你爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸的爸爸，生了你爸爸的爸爸的爸爸，就生了你。”

“哗，原来我有这么多爸爸！”

麦兜不是一个聪明的学生，不过傻蛋归傻蛋，麦兜还是个听话的小朋友。他吃得，多拉得，多力气也大：为同学们扭开瓶盖；他也会很小心不踩着地上的蚂蚁；他很慢，但是他手很巧，他会折一些吃饱了撑的东西出来，等妈妈下班回来，送给妈妈。麦兜在向别人介绍自己的兴趣的时候，总喜欢说“我最喜欢吃鸡。我妈妈最喜欢吃鸡。我最喜欢和我最喜欢的妈妈一起吃妈妈跟我都最喜欢的快快鸡。”

“行啊，很郭德纲啊。”

我们的故事就从这儿开始。

“May呀，你说屁股有多懒啊？”

“不懒，屁股不知道多勤快呢。真的，屁股从早到晚扭吖扭吖扭来扭去。一会儿坐下一会儿，又站起来，还要拉屎呢。好啦，游泳它要扭。浮上来它又要扭。坐车就要看你坐什么车呢。有时候扭吖扭吖扭吖扭，比走路还惨呢。我有个friend（朋友），在放新年假的时候，搭飞机去新西兰啊…。”

“托运还是手提呀？”

“吖？”

“她的屁股吖…”

“当然是手提啦。就这样扭吖扭吖扭到奥克兰。以为可以享受享受了，谁知道还要骑马，哗。” “阿May呀，那你觉得呢，是我懒呀还是屁股懒啊？”

“当然是你比屁股懒啦。”

“呜呜”

我希望可以拉屎，老师继续唱歌。我希望我可以很快，写对那些生字，不用那块橡皮。我希望我争气，妈妈不用挤眼泪，不用有更年期。我希望得到A，不会差一丁点。

麦兜：麻烦你，鱼丸粗面。

校长：没有粗面。

麦兜：是吗，来碗鱼丸河粉吧。

校长：没有鱼丸。

麦兜：是吗，要牛肚粗面吧。

校长：没有粗面。

麦兜：呃，那要鱼丸油面吧。

校长：没有鱼丸。

麦兜：怎么什么都没有啊？那要墨鱼丸粗面。

校长：没有粗面。

麦兜：又卖完了。麻烦你来碗鱼丸米线

校长：没有鱼丸。

得巴（小猫）：麦兜啊，他们的鱼丸跟粗面卖光了。就是所有跟鱼丸和粗面的配搭都没了。 麦兜：哦，没有那些搭配啊。麻烦你只要鱼丸吧。

校长：没有鱼丸。

麦兜：那粗面呢？

校长：没有粗面.......

纸包鸡——欢迎大家收看《麦太世界》，今日我为大家介绍一个简单又别致的小菜——纸包鸡，家里的小朋友一定很喜欢。材料很简单，我们只需要一个鸡包，我们将鸡包底部的纸撕下来.....。慢慢的撕，就会得到一张鸡包纸，然后将鸡包纸反转，这一味纸包鸡就完成了，很容易是吧？多谢大家收看！

纸鸡包——好高兴这么快又和大家见面了，接下来我会教大家做一味纸鸡包，材料也很简单，只需要白纸一张，我们只需要把纸这样子(揉成一团).....一味纸鸡包就这样完成了，各位小朋友，你们说像不像鸡包？

包鸡纸 包 鸡包纸 包 鸡——现在要教大家一味很别致的小菜----包鸡纸 包 鸡包纸 包 鸡，首先将纸包鸡小心撕开，大家就会有一张包鸡纸及一块鸡，接着把鸡包纸像我这样子包住那块鸡，然后再像这样子用包鸡纸包包包包住它，那一味包鸡纸 包 鸡包纸 包 鸡就完成了！是不是很简单啊？还真有一块鸡吃呢！

鸡包 包 鸡包 包 鸡包纸 包 纸包鸡 包 包鸡纸 包 鸡包纸 包 鸡——做法也很简单，只要将鸡包包住个鸡包，再包住个鸡包，包住那张鸡包纸，再包包包包包住个纸包鸡，再包包包包鸡包纸，纸纸纸纸，纸包纸，纸包鸡 ，包鸡纸，纸包鸡，再包纸纸纸……再包鸡鸡鸡……

Wheat, were pocket, Zizhong fat, birth and death unknown. Is one of our very minor, very minor thinkers, inventors. It is said that his invention, including rice cookers, water heaters, electric coils, and electric nose hair machine. However, because the moment forget the invention have electricity, so his inventions are at home, to be useless. Shadow Kick is his invention. He also invented the contact lens and invisible tights. However, because no one is visible, so not included in history. Wheat is the world's first phone Chung fertilizer manufacturing, but also because the world's second call, to the nineteenth century not only created by the American Bell, the world's first telephone wheat sitting next to other, ah, so, ah, ah ... so ... wait until the day he died, his phone is never rung.

In wheat Chung died a few years later, in the south of the Yangtze River tributaries below the bottom of the bottom, is the tip of the Pearl River Delta, and on this sharp pointed, that is, Hong Kong Tai Kok Tsui, we found may be that wheat Chung 18th generation descendants of fertilizer - McDull. "Mom, what is the 18th generation descendants of it?" "Ah ... is your father's father's father's father's father's father, gave birth to your father's father's father's father Dad's father's father, gave birth to your father's father's father's father's father, gave birth to your father's father's father's father's father's father's father, birth to your father's father's father, gave birth to you. "" Wow, I have had so much Dad! "

McDull is not a bright student, but the stupid go stupid, McDull or an obedient children. He eat, Dora was, much effort is also large: for the students turn on the caps; he will be very careful not to tread on the ground the ants; he was very slow, but his hand is very clever, he fed off some of the hold things up, so my mother came home from work, gave her mother. McDull introduce to others when their own interests, likes to say "I like to eat chicken. My mother's favorite chicken. My favorite and my favorite of my mother with my mother to eat all the chicken favorite quickly. "" OK, ah, ah very GuoDeGang. "Our story started from here.

"May Yeah, you lazy ass how ah?" "No lazy ass does not know more diligent. Really, twisted ass acridine acridine writhing twisting from morning to night. A moment to sit down for a while, stood up, have to shit it. Well, it is to twist swimming. and rise to it but also twist. car depends on what kind of car do you sit and sometimes twisted twisted acridine acridine acridine twisted twisted, still miserable than walking it, I have a friend (friend), put the New Year holidays at the time, a plane to New Zealand ah .... "" checked or hand-held you? "" acridine? "" acridine her ass ... "" Of course, mobile friends. acridine so twisted twistedacridine twist to Auckland. I thought I could enjoy enjoy, and who knows but also riding, Wow. "

"A May Yeah, you think it is still my lazy ass lazy ah ah?" "Of course, you lazy ass than her." "Whining" I want to shit, the teachers continue to sing. I hope I can quickly, write vocabulary of those who, without the piece of rubber. I hope I live up to expectations, do not squeeze the tears of my mother, do not have

menopause. I hope to be A, not bad a little bit.

McDull: trouble you, rough fish.

President: no rough.

McDull: Really, a bowl of fish balls noodle bar.

Principal: No fish.

McDull: Really, rough it to tripe.

President: no rough.

McDull: uh, that fish oil to it.

Principal: No fish.

McDull: how nothing ah? Mexican fish to rough it.

President: no rough.

McDull: they sold out. Trouble you to fish noodle bowl

Principal: No fish.

Get bar (cat): McDull ah, their balls with rough sold out. Is that all rough with the match balls and gone. McDull: Oh, not those with ah. Trouble as long as you fish it.

Principal: No fish.

McDull: I rough it?

President: There is no rough .......

Wrap chicken - Welcome to watch "Jimmy too world", today I introduce a simple and unique side dishes - chicken wrap, the children must be very like home.Material is very simple, we only need one package of chicken, chicken package we will tear off the bottom of the paper .....。 Slowly tear, the chicken will get a paper bag, paper bag and then reverse the chicken, which wrap the chicken is done blindly, it is easy is not it? Thank you for watching!

Paper bag of chicken - I am very glad to meet you so soon again, and, and then I will teach you to do the blind chicken paper bag, the material is also very simple, just a white one, we just have to like this paper (crumpled )..... so blindly paper complete package of chicken, you kids, you say a lot like chicken package?

Package chicken chicken wrap chicken wrap package - is now very chic to teach the blind side dishes ---- package chicken wrap chicken wrap packages of chicken, first carefully tear the chicken wrap, we would have a package of chickenpaper and a piece of chicken, then put the paper bag like the chicken wrap I like this piece of chicken, then the child with a package like this chicken wrap bags wrap it, package it blindly wrap chicken chicken chicken wrap is complete package ! Is not very simple ah? Really eat a piece of chicken!

Bag bag chicken chicken chicken wrap wrap package bags of chicken chicken chicken wrap chicken wrap package - also very simple, as long as the live chicken chicken bag package, and then wrap the chicken bag, wrap it Zhang Chicken Wraps, wrap a bag and then wrap the chicken bag, and then the chicken bag bag bag paper, paper paper paper paper, paper wrap, wrap

chicken, including chicken paper, wrap the chicken, then wrapped in paper paper and then wrapped in paper ... ... ... ... penis chicken

英语搞笑剧本 6人篇十：英语剧本

第一个剧本

Cast

Mr. Green

Miss Blue

Police

Nurse

Doctor

Daughter

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene I

(Green Garden St.)

(During the rush hours, when the street is crowded , Mr. Green is driving past the red light , unexpectedly a car accident happens... Two people came out of their cars angrily...)

Miss Blue: Oh! It's you, Mr. Green... Do you know how to drive your car?

Mr. Green: You see that I was driving across the road! Wow! There is a dent on my beloved BENZ.

Miss Blue: My BMW has got a dent too, you should compensate me.

(While they are quarrelling, later on, the police comes.)

Police: What's happened?

Mr. Green: She has bumped into my car!

Miss Blue: No! It is himself that drove past the red light...

(Quarrel again ...)

Police: Has any one been injured?

Mr. Green: I feel headache , foot ache , ache very much.

Miss Blue: I ache all over too.

(Both of them mourn painfully...)

Police: Then I'll call an ambulance (O-E-O-E ...).

Scene II

(Blue Sky Hospital-Emergency)

(Ambulance sends them to the hospital)

Nurse: Who is injured?

(Both of them say it is themselves at the same time...)

Nurse: What's your name, Mr.?

Mr. Green: Call me DPP Green.

Nurse: (Unhappy facial expression) Oh! Go to the corner and sit there.

Mr. Green: But ... (nurse interrupts)

Nurse: Go! Don't speak any words.....what's your name, Miss?

Miss Blue: My name is KMT Blue.

Nurse: (gentle and smiles) Oh, Miss this side, please. Would you tell me how you are

feeling?

Miss Blue: Oh! I ache all over...

Nurse: OK! I'll help you stop the pain first, and then the doctor will treat you in a while.

(Mr. Green comes over to require medical treatment, but rejected)

Mr. Green: Nurse, I...I feel...

Nurse: Wait there, didn't you hear me?

(Mr. Green goes back helplessly, the doctor comes over at this moment...)

Nurse: The young lady called KMT Blue...KMT Blue.

Doctor: Ok! I see... How are you, Miss?

Miss Blue: I got an car accident and I ache all over...

Doctor: (Check) It's ok...don't worry about it. I'll give you some medicine. You'll get well soon......

Miss Blue: Thank you, doctor..

(Miss Blue leaves.)

Doctor: Next one. (Mr. Green comes in and Dr. reads his medical record) You are called DPP Green!

Mr. Green: Yeah! Any problem with that ?

Doctor: Hmm...(Consider) DPP Green (Raise up voice)? What's wrong with you? Mr. Green: I ache all over-headache, toothache and foot ache (The doctor interrupts him impatiently) ...

Doctor: I... I... I see, Miss Lin – give Mr. Green an injection（注射）...

Mr. Green: What? An injection?

(Nurse takes out the syringe（注射器）)

Nurse: Where do you want to inject?

(Mr. Green is frightened and shivering （发抖）...

Mr. Green: Well, doctor ...that ...I do not ache anymore, I...I want to leave.

Nurse: Wait! Don't go...

(Nurse pulls Mr. Green and forces him to enter the injection room)

Mr. Green: Wow! ...... That hurts!

(Miss Blue goes out of the emergency room, but Mr. Green leaves in terrible pain. 第二个剧本 《逃课》英语话剧剧本 Skipping Class

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cast

Anita: Never understands why students like to skip classes

Kevin: Treats “skipping classes” as the principle of university life

Ken: Eager to skip classes but dares not to do it

Jason: Always commits himself not to skip classes

Steven: Always gives himself a good excuse for skipping class

Rita: A professional class skipper

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene I

(Anita, Kevin, Ken, Jason, Steven, and Rita are all Tunghai University students. They are good friends. One day, Ken and Jason meet on the way to the classroom.)

Ken: Why are you late? And, you just missed the last class. The teacher gave us the main topics for the mid-term examination.

Jason: Oh, shoot! I just missed it. Would you lend me your notes so I can make a copy? Ken: Sure if you give me a good reason why you missed the class. You promised me that you would be in class on time today.

Jason: Believe me, I would like to keep my word. The problem is that I have the “Business Management” test today and I was up ing for it till three o’clock this morning. Then I fell asleep and woke up at ten o’clock this morning.

Ken: You studied until three o’clock this morning? Why? What did you do yesterday afternoon? I know you were free from four o’clock on yesterday.

Jason: Well, I met one of my very old friends on line and we just talked too long…

Ken: For God’s sake（理由）! Don’t you care about next week’s mid-term examination?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene II

(Anita, Steven and Kevin are talking to one another in front of a classroom. And, Anita is trying to prevent Steven and Kevin from cutting the next class.)

Anita: Hey, we’ll have the “Business Management” class in a few minutes. Where are you going? Don’t tell me that you are going to argue with Jason.

Steven: I will do anything for my good friend. Of course I am going to argue with the guy who gave my good friend a hard time.

Anita: You always like to get involved in someone else’s business. You’ll get yourself in trouble. Don’t you know it? ...

Kevin: Anita, don’t be upset with him. He will not listen to you. Just leave him alone. By the way, I am still waiting for your decision. Are you coming with me to the concert tomorrow? Anita: Oh, I am sorry that I almost forgot it. What time tomorrow?

Kevin: Two o’clock. I cannot wait to see my adorable（值得崇拜的） superstar – Jolin. Oh, how wonderful!

Anita: wait a minute. We have Calculus （微积分）class tomorrow afternoon. Are you out of your mind?

Kevin: Well, I’m not. Yet I think we can just copy the notes from someone else.

Anita: No, this is a very important class. And you would never understand it without listening to the lecture.

Kevin: To me it makes no difference. Even if I were in the class I would never understand what the teacher is talking about. Besides, who likes to look at the old baldhead（秃头的人）? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene III

(After Calculus class, Anita is on the way to the ST building. At the same time, Rita is walking to the ST building from the dorm.（宿舍） They meet in front of the laboratory.)

Rita: Here I am. Look, I did what I promised. I am a good girl, not skipping classes.

Anita: What are you talking about? This is the 5th class. You skipped the first four classes this morning. Yesterday you promised that you would not skip any class.

Rita: Did I? We don’t have any class in the morning but we’re packed in the afternoon on Wednesdays.

Anita: I beg your pardon（原谅）? Today is Thursday and we have classes the whole day. Besides, didn’t you meet us this morning while we were going out to class?

Rita: I thought you were going to the library.

Anita: You are loopy（神经错乱的；呆头呆脑的） now because you’ve skipped too, too many classes.

Rita: Why did you say so? I know that we will have the Computer Program test tomorrow. Anita: You are incurable. The test was this morning!

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Scene IV

(Ken and Rita are talking to each other. They are talking about how to skip a class. )

Ken: I wonder why your Calculus professor never takes attendance. Yet, every time I skipped class, my professor always knew I was absent. I think I am really unlucky.

Rita: well, you’ll appreciate what I’m going to tell you now, my three very good

suggestions.

Ken: What are they?

Rita: Now lend me your ears – First of all, whether you skip the class or not, you’ll never pass the course.

Ken: How do you know that I will not pass?

Rita: Calculus is extremely difficult. I don’t believe you can pass it.

Ken: Maybe you are right. What else?

Rita: Before you skip the class you should treat everyone nicely. And after that, you should try to flatter（.奉承，谄媚，阿谀） your professor.

Ken: Why?

Rita: Well if you treat the classmates nicely, they will help you sign your name on the

attendance sheet. And if you flatter your professor properly, you may ask the professor to pass you.

A Taxi Driver

by Sofia Chen陳南妤

一天出租车司机Tommy遇到了很多奇怪的事情。烦人的女孩、孕妇、抢匪、不管事的警察，甚至还遇到了鬼。。。

Cast

Erin Chang: Robber

Debby Tsai: Police officer

Serrin Lee: Betel nut girl

Alec Zhao: Ghost student

Leo Lee: Taxi driver

Yi-ling Chen: Pregnant woman

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