6人简单搞笑英语剧

导读：　6人简单搞笑英语剧篇一：6人英语小品短话剧剧本 ...

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇一：6人英语小品短话剧剧本

6人英语小品短话剧剧本

A(衣衫褴褛） B（衣着光鲜） C小花 D小草 E椅子 F新闻记者

B坐在E上吃东西，A一乞丐上前

A：先生，先生，请给我些面包，谢谢，我饿得不行了。

B：（厌恶）让开，让开。（然后便起身离开，这时他的钱包掉到E上头了）

A：先生，先生（A看见后，立即拾起，追上了走远的B）

B：让开，让开啊，我没吃的了，也没钱了（看也不看A，仍自顾自地走了）

C：他真愚蠢啊

D：是啊是啊（D点头附和）

A：可„„先生„„您听我说„„（仍拉着B衣服的后摆）

B：挖，你这人怎么这么讨厌！（还是没有回头看A一眼）

C：椅子啊，你会不会觉得刚刚坐在你身上的人特愚蠢？

E：唉，人总是这么愚蠢啊~~~~

D：是啊是啊

与此同时A与B还在纠缠，这时E终于隐忍不住爆发了。

E：先生！你的钱包丢了！你怎么这么傻啊。

A与B同时回头，看见了那会说话的椅子E，吓昏过去了。这一幕恰巧被经过的F看见了。于是F就报道了这一事件。

F：大家好，我是新闻记者F，今天我看见了一个奇异的现象，一个椅子说话了，两个人被吓昏了，下面我将采访一下被吓昏的两个人。

B：哦，上帝，哦，妈妈。

F：这个人傻了，我们不鸟他了，下面我采访一下另一个人吧，请问你为什么不告诉他，他的钱包丢了？

A：对不起，我不知道“钱包”这个单词怎么讲„„

F：通过这一事件，我们可以认识到，掌握一门外语的重要性，以及金钱给人类带来的影响。是吗，椅子？

E：是啊，是啊（E傻傻地拼命点头）

C：唉，人可真愚蠢，椅子也被他们弄傻了。

D：谁让这是一个童话呢„„

为了配合马可的英文翻译，所以台词能简单就简单啦。下面是马可的英文翻译。

A:sir,sir,please give me a piece of bread.thank you,sir.I'm hungry to die.

B:get away,get away,dirty man.

A:sir,sir!!

B:run away,please run away.I have no food,and I don't have money,either.

C:hey,xiao D,he is so foolish,isn't he?

D:yes,yes.

A:but....sir....please listen to me.....

B:wa,why are you so disgusting!!

C:hey,chair,do you feel the man sat on you a moment ago is very stupid.

E:ai,pretty flower,do you know,men are always very silly.

D:yes,yes!!

E:sir!you lost your wallet!can't you be more clever?

F:good morning,everybody.I'm a jonrnist F. Today I saw a very weird thing--a chair open her mouth,and two men are frightened to faint.now,I will intenview the two nozzy man.

B:wo,my god,wo,my,mum.

F:I'm sorry to tell you this man has been mad.we needn't take notice of him.let me interview the other man,hello,man,can you tell men why didn't you tell him he lost his wallet?

A:I'm sorry,I don't know how to speak "钱包" in english......

F:dear audience,through this thing we can learn that how improtant it is to mastery a foreign language,and how lagre the money affect us.is that all right,chair?

E:yes,yes. （本文来自天空剧本网 ）

C:ai,men is so silly.

D:don't believe us,it is just a fairly tale.

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇二：搞笑大学6人剧本

搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》 搞笑5人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》 演员表：

西门吹雪

叶孤城

花满楼

king

旁白

道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠

旁白：A quiet villageis covered with white snow .

Bird sare dancing in the cold .

Amanis walking along the street ,step by step .

Wind is coming in silence.

Another my sterious man approaches . Y与X相遇．

X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you ! Y:Haha, Never mind baybay.

X:Excuse me， who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?

Y:ha ha ,I won’t change my name! No matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you? X:I am xi men chui xue.

Y惊讶:Ar, xi men chui xue?

X:Yes,what is wrong?

Y:I heard that you are the besting MartialArts?

X:Great, you know me !

Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me you go!

X:No, I must kill you !

Y:I don‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t want to be killed.There are a eighty-year-old mothe and a three-yearold son to be looked after by me!

X:No way! Because we are fighting now! youk now?

Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t force me!

X:Pardon!

(Y拿出一袋牛奶)

X抢过牛奶:milk, very good! I like drinking it. How do you know that?

Y:please drink it!

X喝完牛奶:Thanks, ha,ha

Y:Do you still want to kill me?

X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.

Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good! Very good! I hope you will not for get what you said!? X:I’m sure I won’t!

Y:I must give you alesson! I fIdon‖‖‖‖‖‖‖‖t be at your this time, you’ll never behave properly!3-2-1-0! X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !

Y大笑：Ha Ha……

X可怜状: help! help! Where is the washroom?

Y:What ?

X:To liet?

Y:What ?

X:The ―WC‖?

Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see acorssing road! X:Thanks,bye bye.

Y掏出纸屑吹:This is genuirne snow! H:Stop!Protecting the environment is abasicobligation!

Y:Who are you?

H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?

Y:Yes, he was beatenbymeandisin―WC‖ now,ha……

H惊讶:Nowyouarethebestintheworld!

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇三：6人英语话剧剧本[1]

6人英语爱情话剧剧本-Where Is My Mr. Right?

6人剧本。关于爱情的，剧情简单，oneday谈过几次恋爱....最终找到了自己的真爱。不错的剧本。

Cast

Female leading character: Oneday

Oneday‘s first friend: Wayne

Oneday‘s second boyfriend: Tom

Oneday‘s third boyfriend & Beryl‘s boyfriend: Jack

Oneday‘s fourth boyfriend: Martin

Oneday‘s friend: Beryl

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Scene 1 A Big Shock

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Beryl: Oneday, how about going to see stars together this evening?

Oneday: O.K.! I want to ask my boyfriend to join us.

Beryl: Um! Sure, but I don't want to get caught between you and your boyfriend. So I think I'd better ask my boyfriend to go with me, too.

Oneday: O.K.!

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Oneday: Honey, look. There are so many stars in the sky.

It's really a breath-taking picture, isn't it?

Wayne: Um!

Oneday: Why do you look so unhappy this evening? Is everything O.K.?

Wayne: Oneday, I am sorry. There's something I want to tell you.

Oneday: What? What is it?

Wayne: I feel so sorry to you.

Oneday: Why? Why did you say that? Is there something wrong?

Wayne: I'm very sorry. The thing is I'm in love with someone else.

Oneday: What? Someone else? What about me?

Wayne: I am very sorry. It's my fault. Please forgive me.

I hope you can find a man who really loves you.

Oneday: Wayne...NO!!

Wayne: Good luck!

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Beryl: What's wrong? You look awful. What happened to you?

Oneday: Wayne just broke up with me.

Beryl: I'm so sorry to hear that. But, why?

Oneday: Don't ask me why. Let's just get out of here.

Beryl: Sure. Let's go.

Scene 2 A Chance Encounter

Beryl: Oneday, there is a man who has been peeping at you for a while.

Oneday: Really? Where is he?

Beryl: Don‘t look now. He is just behind you on the side, and he wears a white shirt. I

can‘t believe it; he is still looking at you.

Oneday: How interesting! I must take a peek at him.

Beryl: O.K. But don‘t make it too obvious.

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Tom: Should I go tell Oneday that I love her?

Martin: Why not? I think you two make a great couple. You should give it a try. Tom: O.K. Wish me luck!

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Beryl: Oneday, you won‘t believe this. That man is coming right up this way.

Oneday: Really? I wonder what he is up to.

Tom: Hi, Oneday. It is nice to see you here.

Oneday: Hi, Tom.

Beryl: You two know each other?

Oneday: Yeah. Berly, this is Tom.

Beryl: Hi.

Oneday: Tom, this is Beryl.

Tom: Hi.

Tom: Oneday, I would like to let you know that I like you. Let me take care of you. I am not like Wayne. I won‘t treat you the way he treated you. You can put yourself at ease. Oneday: This is happening too fast. I have to think about it.

Beryl: He seems to be a nice guy. Just give him a chance.

Oneday: Are you sure? (in low voice)

Beryl: (Nodding.)

Oneday: O.K., Tom. Let‘s give it a try. I hope that you will remember what you just said and you will keep your promise.

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(One month later.)

Tom: Oneday, I have to tell you that I will have to leave Taichung because I am going to school in Taipei. I am afraid we won‘t be able to be together any more. Sorry!

Oneday: Even if you have to leave Taichung, we can still be together, can‘t we?

Tom: No, I don‘t think so. Distance will change our relationship sooner or later. So, it would be better we just call it quits. I am very sorry.

Oneday: I cannot believe this is happening to me again.

Scene 3 Another Romance

Jack: Oneday, I know you had two unpleasant relationships before, and those two men hurt you very much. But please believe me. I am different from them. I will take good care of you with all my heart.

Oneday: (talking to herself) Maybe Jack is really serious about me. Maybe I should give him a chance and accept his love. (talking to Jack) O.K., Jack. I will accept your love.

Jack: Thank you so much. You won‘t regret it.

Oneday: I surely hope not.

(One year later.)

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Beryl: Oneday, I‘m so happy for you. It seems you really found your Mr. Right this time. Jack has been so nice to you all this time.

Oneday: Yes, I feel so much in love. We have known each other for one year, and we are going to celebrate this special day tonight. So let‘s chat some other day. Bye!

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Jack: Today is our first anniversary. I‘ve got some good news and bad news to share with you.

Oneday: Good news and bad news? Well, good news first, then

Jack: I passed the graduate school entrance exam, and will soon go to graduate school.

Oneday: That‘s great. Congratulations! Going to graduate school has always been your dream. I‘m so glad that you have made your dream come true.

Jack: But……

Oneday: But what? This is great news. You should be happy.

Jack: But, there‘s some bad news.

Oneday: Bad news? O.K., I am ready for it.

Jack: Let‘s break up!

Oneday: What? Break up? Why?

Jack: You know I have to concentrate on my schoolwork and study very hard after I go to graduate school. Therefore, I choose to give up our relationship, and I hope you can understand my decision. I‘m really sorry.

Oneday: That‘s enough. No more sorry! You just go.

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(On the phone.)

Oneday: Beryl, it happened again. Jack broke up with me (crying).

Beryl: Oh, poor girl. Stop crying. What you need right now is a good break and sleep. You can tell me the whole thing when we see each other tomorrow.

Oneday: O.K.! I‘ll try to get some sleep. Good night.

Beryl: Good night.

Scene 4 A Happy Ending

Oneday: What kind of girl do you think I am?

Martin: What kind of girl are you? Um…, you are a lively and kind girl.

Oneday: I‘m glad to hear that. Actually, I quite like you.

Martin: Really?

Oneday: I feel we can talk to each other. When I am sad, you comfort me and try to make me happy. I feel so lucky to have you as my friend.

Martin: Of course, we are good friends!

Oneday: But, what if I want for you is something more than JUST a good friend?

Martin: More than just a good friend? What do you mean?

Oneday: I mean I like you. I…I want to be your girlfriend.

Martin: Girlfriend? Oh, no. I must be frank with you because you are a very good person. I don‘t want to hurt you. So, let‘s just be friends.

Oneday: Can‘t we give it a try? I‘ll be a very sweet girlfriend.

Martin: For Pete‘s sake. Let me be honest with you. I‘m in love with a man.

He…he is Wayne!

Oneday: Oh, my god!!!

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Wayne: I‘m so lucky to have you. I love you.

Martin: I love you, too, Wayne. (Holding each other‘s hands.)

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Oneday: That‘s not fair! They‘ve got each other and love each other so much.

But, look at me. Where is my Mr. Right?!

6人英语剧本，一个歌手的一生

Cast

Raymond: Raymond

Kemp: Raymond‘s father

Michelle: a passerby

Grace: a composer

Peggy: piano teacher

Heather: a composer

Summary

This play is about a singer‘s life. When Raymond was a child, his father found him having a great gift for music. So, he began to learn some musical instruments. He joined lots of contests and also became a music writer. Besides, he liked singing very much. He wanted to have an album of his own. Could his dream come true? Let‘s take a look.

SCENE I

(Raymond‘s home)

R‘s F: Welcome to my house. It‘s a little messy. Make yourself at home.

PT: That‘s OK. We haven‘t seen each other for a long time since we graduated from college. You haven‘t changed much. Is someone playing piano in your house?

R‘s F: Yeah it‘s my son. Hey, Raymond. Can you stop making noise? You have been playing the piano all day long.

PT: He‘s playing the piano very well.

R‘s F: Thank you. The piano is his birthday gift from his mother when he was 12 years old. He has played the piano every day since then.

PT: I think that he has potential playing the piano. I‘m a music professor at Tunghai University. If it‘s OK with you, I want to teach him how to play.

R‘s F: Great! Thank you. I think that his mother would agree, too.

SCENE II

(Raymond was in his music class one afternoon.)

R: I‘ve already made a mistake at this part many times. I don‘t think I can play the piano well.

PT: Why do you think so? I think you have great talent. You can try to take part in some music contests. You might win.

R: Are you sure? Do you really think I can join contests?

PT: Sure! I believe that you‘ll become a wonderful pianist in the future. But you

must first study with me step by step. Do not give up.

R: I know. Since my mother passed away, no one has taught me how to play the piano. Thank you so much!

PT: As long as you practice hard, I‘ll be happy. By the way, I‘m going to move to the States next month. I‘m very sorry I can‘t teach you anymore.

R: What? You mean…You can‘t continue teaching me to play the piano?

PT: Yes. I‘m so sorry. I‘ve got some serious illness so I have to receive some medical treatment in America.

R: I‘m very sad to hear that. Hope that you can recover as soon as possible.

PT: Whether I continue teaching you or not, you should hold on to your dream: to become a famous musician.

R: I‘ll always remember what you said.

SCENE III

(Seven years later, Raymond created his own songs and joined many contests.

But no one liked to listen to his songs. For the past 7 years, he often suffered from unpopularity. However, Raymond still wrote some new songs and sent them to a record company.)

Raymond: Sir, these are my songs. Please listen to them.

C1: (To composer 2) I think his songs are pretty good, but….

C2: But the style is not very favorable in the market, right?

C1: Well, how about changing his style?

C2: That sounds great. We can make some small changes in his songs, and let the music company try to produce a new album for him.

C1: So…tell him to come over and discuss the details.

C2: (To Raymond) We think your songs have potential. You can make some changes in them. And then, we can help you to publish them. You might become a super star.

R: Thank you! But I don‘t want any changes in my songs. So I think we can‘t work together this time. Sorry!

C1: Hmm… OK! Suit yourself!

SCENE IV

(Raymond left the company and walked on the street. He thought if should change his style in the music and publish his songs. But he had no ideas. And then, he began to sing songs on the street.) R: ( singing )

(A passerby looked at him.)

P: You really have a good voice. I think you can think about signing a contract with us.

R: Really? Do you really think I have a good voice? But, why don‘t you think my style is strange? Why don‘t you suggest I change it?

P: No! No! No! I like your style. I think you‘re the right person for us. Let‘s work together and our company will publish a new album for you! My name is Michelle. I‘ll call you soon.

R: This is my phone number.

P: OK. Bye-bye.

SCENE V

(One day, Raymond got a call from a foreign company.)

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇四：六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞

六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞

Wander severy five miles

焦仲卿Johnny (Jforshort) 刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)

焦母Johnny’s mother (JMforshort) 刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)

太守之子Mayor’sson (MSforshort) 强盗Burglars(ABandC)

(Johnny（焦仲卿）作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)

Johnny（焦仲卿）:Everybody says that I’m henpecked,but in fact,I’m as strong as a tiger,(小声)while my wifeis Wu Song. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’m not afraid of you! (内砸出一脸盆, Johnny（焦仲卿）接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’m afraid of whom?

My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me.All this I do not care.I only want her to be tender than me.But she is not!Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell! (内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中Johnny（焦仲卿）)

My God!Who can help me?(下)

Act1

(序幕结束时,作窃听状)

焦母（JM）(拄拐棍上):I can!

(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Where are you?

刘兰芝Lunch (扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’m here!What’s up mum?

焦母（JM）:I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.

刘兰芝 Lunch :OK.My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law,what’s up? 焦母（JM）:Since you married my son you have behaved so badly.You have been so rude,sobrusque,so lazy……

刘兰芝 Lunch :But……

焦母（JM）:Never interrupt me!

刘兰芝 Lunch:Never interrupt me!Since I married your son,that terrible Johnny,I have been working hard all day long,cooking and washing.I have raised ten soft housands of pigs and ducks and chicken and……

焦母（JM）:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!

刘兰芝 Lunch (生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)Goandask your son.I’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在焦母（JM）的脸上,下)

Act2

(焦母（JM）坐在台上打毛线刘兰芝Luch拿着锅铲上)

刘兰芝(Luch):Mum,I’m back!

焦母（JM）:You are back?Why?What happened?

刘兰芝(Luch):I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law. 焦母（JM）(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny,I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor,but you did not listen to me.Look at yourself……

1

刘兰芝(Luch):But,mum……

焦母（JM）:Never interrupt me!

刘兰芝(Luch):Mum,I’m not interrupting you.I just want to tell you that you are always right OK?And I’ll marry whom ever you want me to.

刘母Lunch’smother (大喜):Nice girl!Justnow,I met the mayor’s son in the market.Hesaid:“If your daughter Haven’t been married,I really really want to marry her!”Now you are free again,I’ll go and tell him.(下)

刘兰芝(Luch):What?The mayor’s son?The most famous play boy in the neighbor-hood?(手中的锅 铲掉在地上)What as illy thing I have done!(下)

Act3

(焦仲卿Johnny睡眼惺忪上)

焦仲卿Johnny (边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Where are my socks?

(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Here they are!(闻一下) Er!Howsmelly!They are still dirty! (突然想起)Lunch has gone!I have to wash them myself.

(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’m so hungry!But there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围

裙)This is what Lunch always wears!I miss her so much,and her excellent cooking skill!Now she has gone.I have to cook for my mother and myself.

焦母（JM）:Where’s my breakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’t she got up yet?

焦仲卿Johnny:Mum,can’t you remember?Lunch has gone!

焦母（JM）(沉吟片刻):Well,to tell you the truth Johnny,a son without a wifeisuseless.Lunch is an ice girl,go and take her back!

焦仲卿Johnny(立正敬礼):Yes madam!

Act4

(焦仲卿Johnny开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)

A:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!

The road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)

B:And I planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)

C:If you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)

AB&C:Give us all your money!

焦仲卿Johnny (搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):Is1 mao enough?

(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)

2

A:What bad luck!This guy is broken!

B:If we can notrobany money today,we will have nothing to eat tonight!

C:I heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry Miss Liu Lanzhi next month.WE can go and rob the wedding!

A&B:Good idea!

焦仲卿Johnny (惊讶):What?What?Lunch is going to get married?It’s impossible!

AB&C:Why?A pretty girl and a rich man,what a good couple!

焦仲卿Johnny:But Lunch is my wife!We haven’t got divorced yet!

(突然有了主意)I’ve got an idea!You are going to rob the wedding,don’tyou?I’ll go with you.You take the money and I take the bride.

B:Have you got any experience?

焦仲卿Johnny:No.But I’ve got this!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000) Act5

(转眼已到了婚礼之期．太守之子意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，刘兰芝Luch盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)

(焦仲卿Johnny和三强盗跃至台中)

ABC&焦仲卿Johnny:Heyyou!Stop and listen to us!

A:The road is built by me!

B:And I planted one tree.

C:If you want to go by this street---

焦仲卿Johnny:Give us all your money!

刘兰芝(Luch)听到焦仲卿Johnny的声音，掀起了盖头)

刘兰芝(Luch) (惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到焦仲卿Johnny的身边并躲到了的身后) (太守之子大怒，挥拳向焦仲卿Johnn打来．焦仲卿Johnny矮身一躲，太守之子打中了焦仲卿Johnny身后的刘兰芝(Luch)，刘兰芝(Luch)晕倒)

焦仲卿Johnny (火冒三丈):How dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向太守之子冲去）

(焦仲卿Johnny与太守之子混战，焦母上，以拐杖击晕太守之子)

(焦仲卿Johnn将太守之子胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)

焦仲卿Johnny(扶起刘兰芝(Luch)，关切地问):Honey,how are you?

刘兰芝(Luch)(哭状):I hurt a lot!

焦仲卿Johnny:Don’t cry baby.I’ll go and fetch the medicine. (下)

刘兰芝(Luch) (起身去追):Wait for me! (跑下)

3

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇五：搞笑四人英语短剧

Bobo: Ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to today’s “If you are the one”.

Do you want a husband? Do you want a superman? Qk , follow me.

Let’s welcome the three girls.

Come on, babies!

Let us start the first part, “show yourself”

Elaine: Hello, everyone. I want a husband. Actually, I really want a husband.

I want a rich husband. He must have houses and luxuries cars.

I prefer to cry in the BMW rather than laugh in the bike.

If you are rich enough, baby is not the problem.

Bobo: Wo……what do you really want, husband or ……..Mr. money?

Anyway, welcome the next one.

Wendy: Good evening. I’m Wendy. The lover in my dream…en……he must understand me totally.

He must have a white horse. I just want a warm family.

In this place, I wish I could find my true prince.

Rosemary: Good evening. I’m Rosemary. You see, I’m beautiful, right? Tell you a secret, do you

want to know, oh……really? I had just few boyfriends before, just 37. Now, I’m

single, who wants to be the 38?

Bobo: Now, the most important figure will come in. let’s welcome the male guest: Tom. Tom: I don’t believe your program can go on without me. I’m the only male in this place.

I want to tell you, the first girl. I’m rich. Look, these are all my keys. This-BMW, this-Hummer, and this-the house near the sea…cards , this -

Bobo: oh..oh…that’s enough, I want to marry you too..

Tom: Please forgive me. Wendy, I must tell you. In fact, I’m a prince.

What’s more, I have a horse, but it’s black.

Don’t worry, if you agree to marry me, I will pain it into white.

As to the third girl, you, out!

Rosemary: why, why, why?

Tom: No reason. Just out!!!!.

Rosemary: I hate you, bad guy!!!

B: Next is question and answer. Are you ready?

Elaine: me, me!

Bobo: ok, I’ll give you the chance.

Elaine: Do you drop hair?

Tom: How do you know that? Actually, I do.

Elaine: I can help you. You know, I am selling ………

Tom: oh…you are a very kind girl. Can we talk about some details about this?

Elaine: Of course. Why not? By the way, let’s talk about the price. The lowest I can offer is…… Bobo: Hey, you guys, wake up. This is the not ad time, ok?,

Wendy: Please, I’m here too.

Tom: oh….sorry. To show my greatest apologies, my beautiful lady, what can I do for you? Wendy: Can you perform a play for me?

Tom: It’s my honor. I’ll sing a song for you.

………….

Bobo: interesting program, charming man.

Then I will give a chance to you. You can ask one personal question to one female gust. Tom: Wendy, have you remembered Xia Yuhe near the Daming river?

Wendy: who is she, Er kang’s mother in law?

Tom: Wendy, you are so smart.

Bobo: Till now, I think you have made a decision. Tom, hold the girl’s hand if you choose her.

Tom: oh……..my beautiful lady. I’m so sorry. Can I say something to you, Wendy?

Wendy: Sure.

Tom: em…..em………my dear, I love you when a first sight. I know that seems unbelievable. But please trust me. And I will give you the happiest life in the world.

Almost as soon as I entered the house, I singled you out as the companion of my future life. My attentions have been too marked to be mistaken. Almost as soon as I entered the house, I singled you out as the companion of my future life. And now nothing remains for me but to assure you in the most animated language of the violence of my affections. I’ll protect you forever. ( proposal )

Wendy: Yes, I do.

Bobo: So touching. At last, who wants to be Mary’s 38? If you like, call her. Her number is

3838438.Thank you for watching the show, see you next week, bye bye.

And please remember, I’m single too.

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇六：搞笑英语话剧剧本

搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

搞笑7人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》

演员表：西门吹雪、叶孤城、花满楼、king、路人、上官雪儿

旁白

道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠

旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .

Birds are dancing in the cold .

A man is walking along the street ,step by step .

Wind is coming in silence.

Another mysterious man approaches .

Y与X相遇．

X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you !

Y:, Never mind baby.

X:Excuse me， who are you on earth? Could you tell me your name?

Y:,I won’t change my name! no matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you?

X:Iamximenchuixue.

Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?the best MartialArts?

X:Great, you know me !Today is your dead date!

Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! Let me go!

X:No, I must kill you !

Y:I don’t want to be killed. There are a eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son to be looked after by me!

X:No way! Because we are fighting now ! you know ?

Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don’t force me!

X:Pardon!

(Y拿出一袋牛奶)

X抢过牛奶:milk, very good ! I like drinking it. How do you know that?

Y:please drink it!

X喝完牛奶:Thanks,

Y:Do you still want to kill me ?

X:Sure, must! Milk is milk.

Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good ! very good ! I hope you will not forget what you said!?

X:I’m sure I won’t!

Y:I must give you a lesson ! If I don’t beat you this time, you’ll never behave properly ! 3-2-1!

X捂着肚子，蹲下（做痛苦状）：Oach,Oach !

Y大笑：HaHa……the milk is exceed the time limit

（一人路过，x起身跑过去）

X可怜状: excuse me! Help , help , Where is the washroom?please ,tell me .

Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street and turn right when you see a corssing road!

X:Thanks,byebye.

Y:byebye (以胜利者的语气，转头,看见 花满楼)

Y:Who are you?

H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen ximenchuixue?

Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in “WC” .

H惊讶:Now you are the best in the world !

Y:You are right !

H:Teriffic ! you are the one my king looking for ! do you want join in us? If you follow my

king,he will give what you want.

Y:Yes,It’s very good.

H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!

第二幕：无间道

H:My dearest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you! （指Y） this is yegucheng.

K:sit down plese, yegucheng.

Y:excuse me,I have a question.will you give me what I want just if I follow you?

King:yes,I will.

Y:That’s good. Can you give me a MM ?

K:of couse.You are the one who has the similar taste with me! Hahaha……

Y:of course.

美女出场

M:hello，帅锅..

K: this is shangguanxueer.ok,now let’s have a ritual.

H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Do you want to follow my king no matter

what happens such as cold headache , poor ,rich?

Y: Yes,I do.

K: Huamanlou, come . put the ring on his finger!（音乐停）

X唱着上:(看到戒指) this ring should be mine!

K:But who are you ? why should it belong to you?

Y急切: king! Dear king ! I must go now , my brother is looking for me.

X冷酷:yegucheng! Come here ! I want to tell you something!

Y抱X的腿:old brother ! Forgive me!

X:Forgive you? Why ?

Y: Once there was a chance before me , I lost it . If the god give me another chance, I’ll tell

you “ I love you ” , If the remustbea limited period,I hope it is thousand year!

X:You shall cheat me ! all you did are wrong ! how can you tell me the lady’s “WC”! Y:I like going lady’s WC .I……I……I think that you like what I like.(Ｙ又拿出一袋牛奶)

X:milk?I love you.

K:Don’t say that “you love me”. I’ll kill you for you saying dirty word to me !

X:What? (侧耳装着听不到) You—kill—-me?come, come…(Ｘ上去抓住K)

K:Fuck you. I must kill you!

X:How can you kill me? haha……

Y:Let me have a try! 3-2-1(X捂着肚子，蹲下)

M: oh,what happened?（看着X，做惊吓状）are you ok?（跑

到西门吹雪身边）

Y :do you want to go to wc?

X:Yes,I……I…… do.

Y:haha, the milk was added 三聚氰胺 beyond standards.

M: you , stupid , bad behavior ! go away !

K; why ? why do you help him ! who actually are you ?

M: actually,I’m a spy sended by LuXiaofeng,and I fell in love with ximenchuixue. K惊讶: !you—you—You are X’lover?

Y: do you know, you are the first person who cheated me ! I hate you .(轻声说)let me tell you,Ｘwill die.

M扑倒在Ｘ的身边：Ｘ,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope in the future and

tomorrow is a good beginning !

K:what a moving story ! I was impressed ! Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !

M: life is a progress ,and it is delight that it needn’t resume !

(M忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，Ｋ吓跑.音乐《再见，警察》起)

Y痛苦状:I never anticipate you treat me by this ,why?tell me why?(Y死，音乐停)

（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）

M: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .

X:go home ! ?

M:Tomorrow is another day ! even you have the last second to live ,you should be alive ,not only for me , but for our love.

X: promise me,you’ll get on well,and you’ll never let go.

M I promise . I will never let go（X死） ,

M: be alive !yeah , be alive ! be alive without ahendance !

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇七：搞笑英语短剧

Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company. This day they are talking in the office.

Ca: Bingo! I finally finish this case. It is really tough! I have not slept well for almost a week.

Wing: Me too .I always get so busy in this season. I have drunk three cups of coffee in order to keep awake.

Ci: Our boss must be enjoying his holiday in Fiji very much. What do you think he will feel when he comes back to see our case?

Ca:Of course he will feel surprised and give each of us a promotion. Wing: Come on, he is a devil, how could he do this to us? Anyway, we should award ourselves for these days hard work!

Ca: You are right. Let’s pig out on junk food!

Wing: I have stayed in China for a whole year and I miss my hometown. I miss German food!

Ca: so do I .how much I love French food!

Ci: I have not eaten German or French food before. Do you have any recommendation?

Ca: If you visit France or go to a French restaurant, snails, cheese, and goose liver and red wine are the best choices.

Wing: You also can’t miss the famous German sausage, ham and blue checse Ci: They all sound yummy. But do you know what Chinese eat when they miss their families?

Wing&Ca: No

Ci: The answer is dumplings!

Ca:Well ,I heard that before though I haven’t tasted .

Wing: Can you make dumplings, CiCi? Would you make some for us? I have been longing for dumplings for a long time.

Ci: Aha, it is as easy as a pie for me .what about coming to my house tonight? We can make dumplings together. I will teach you how to cook it.

Ca: Great! That is fantastic. Then it will be the first time to make and eat dumplings

Wing: Very good idea! We could busy some basic ingredient at the supper market after work.

Ci: Sure.We need flour, yeast, pork, cabbages, vinegar, sauce and ginger. (The three colleagues had their shopping and now they are in CiCi’s house)

CiCiours some pour on the table and said:”Carrie, can you fetch some water here?”

Ca: sure, here you are .what s next?

Ci:Ci:we have to mix the flour yeast and water together .be

careful ,don’t add too much water.

Ca: Okay, I’m kneeing the dough repentedly.it is becoming and softer Wing: Yeah, I am cutting the pork into many small pieces, and then I will add several spoons of oil in it .shall I blend them?

CiCi: Yes, make sure they blend well. A bit salt and a spoon of vinegar are needed, too.

(an hour later)

Ca: Yes, the dumplings are prepared .lets start!

CiCi: Wait! I remember well that you all miss the food from your hometown.Look, what are these?

Ca: Wow! Cheese! Where did you get it? And my favorite red wine. Wing: God. Those are sausage and ham, I can’t believe it!

CiCi: Haha, it is a big surprise, isn’t it? Now ,we are got all three countries’ food ready.

Ca: So it is a complete big meal.

Wing: An unforgettable banquet in my life. Let’s cheers!

Ca, Ci, Wing: Cheers!

6人简单搞笑英语剧篇八：英语搞笑短剧剧本[1]

三打白骨精

Three Times’ Beating Monster

人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空 E：猪八戒

J：沙僧

B：白骨精（何平） B1：B变成的村姑 B2：B变成的太婆B3：B变化成的老头

T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?

S: Bajie,map!

E: (摸出，递给S)

S: Look,boss (凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E）

T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, don’t bring these pictures of beautiful girls!

E: Oh, boss!Forgive me(伸手拿回)

T: (缩手)I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west

E: But……

T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?

E: (递)Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!(坐)My stomach doesn’t allow So. S: Fat Pig!

E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……….

S: You will what(凶相)?

E: (软禁)I will help you catch fleas(跳蚤).

S: Hm!

T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?

E: You see , boss is hungry,too!

T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!

J: But boss,if a monster comes while brother monkey is away…..

T: Em…….It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?

S: No problem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）

J: This is…..?

S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from boss’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!

T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!

S: Bye!(走)

T: Let’s play cards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》

B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.(变成B1)

B1: (接近三人，望着)Can I join you?

J: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against landowner and three people are enough.

B1: (在一旁观看)Oh,Chance! Bomb!

T: Bomb?(打出)

B1: Double King!

T: Oh….I win! Em……,Lady,you are a boss-hand. Come in and teach me!(准备开电网门)

S: (回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)

B1: （倒)Ah……

T: (气愤)Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!

T: Nonsense!(深呼吸)

S: Oh,please don’t……

T:It’s too late!(唱)Once more……you open the door…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)

S: Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)

T: (呛住，咳)Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!

B: (真身出现)Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!(变成太婆)

B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?

T: Daughter?...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡)

S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2) E&J: Are you Ok, boss?(扶T)

J: Look,(伸食指)how many?

T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)Sun Wukong, game over!(变成B3)

B3: (看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!!(哭喊)

S: I’ll kill you, monster!(打)

T: （想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住 )You have killed three lives!

S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!

T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!!

S: (悲，离去)（音乐，营造 “假”悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》

J: boss, brother Monkey is.......

T: Don't mention that guy any more!

B: (出现) Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)

T: （惊）You are......

B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退)

B: (抓住T)I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha......

S: (悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕)A thousand years later.

T: Wukong?

E: Oh,Brother Monkey!

J: Our hero is back!

T: I,I can't understand......What happened?

S: Boss,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you! T: How,how did you find out?

S: (沉默).......Monkey's intuition(直觉)

T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小声)

S: What?

T: I'm sorry.

S: Em? Louder,please?

T: I......am......sorry.....(S 捂耳)（音乐响）《敢问路在何方》（这个放伴奏）

(谢幕)

《孔雀东南飞》

Wanderseveryfivemiles

焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)

太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC)

Prologue

(J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)

J:EverybodysaysthatI’mhenpecked,butinfact,I’masstrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy

wifeisWuSong.

(指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraidofyou!

(内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’mafraidofwhom?

MywifeLunchisthemostfamouswomanintheneighbor-hood.Sheisbraverthanme,

smarterthanmeandstrongerthanme.AllthisIdonotcare.Ionlywanthertobetender

thanme.Butsheisnot!Havingawifelikethisisjustlikelivinginthehell!

(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)

MyGod!Whocanhelpme?(下)

Act1

(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)

JM(拄拐棍上):Ican!

(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Whereareyou?

L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’mhere!What’supmum?

JM:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymostbeautifulgracefuland

dearestmother-in-law”.

L:OK.Mymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother-in-law,what’sup?

JM:Sinceyoumarriedmysonyouhavebehavedsobadly.Youhavebeensorude,sobrusque,so

lazy……

L:But……

JM:Neverinterruptme!

L:Neverinterruptme!SinceImarriedyourson,thatterribleJohnny,Ihavebeenworkinghardall daylong,cookingandwashing.Ihaveraisedtensofthousandsofpigsandducksandchicken

and……

JM:Butallthoseyouhavedonearenotasvaluableasagrandson!

L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,youwantagrandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Goandaskyour

son.I’mleaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)

Act2

(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)

L:Mum,I’mback!

LM:Youareback?Why?Whathappened?

L:Iwaskickedoutbymymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother–in-law.

LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!Ihavealreadytoldyou!Whenyouinsistedon

marryingthatterribleJohnny,Itoldyouthatheisuglystupidandpoor,butyoudidnotlisten

tome.Lookatyourself……

L:But,mum……

L:Mum,I’mnotinterruptingyou.IjustwanttotellyouthatyouarealwaysrightOK?And

I’llmarrywhomeveryouwantmeto.

LM(大喜):Nicegirl!Justnow,Imetthemayor’ssoninthemarket.Hesaid:“Ifyoudaughter Haven’tbeenmarried,Ireallyreallywanttomarryher!”Nowyouarefreeagain,I’llgo

andtellhim.(下)

L(惊愕):What?Themayor’sson?Themostfamousplayboyintheneighbor-hood?(手中的锅 铲掉在地上)WhatasillythingIhavedone!(下)

Act3

(J睡眼惺忪上)

J(边走边道):Lunch!Lunch!Wherearemysocks?

(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Heretheyare!(闻一下) Er!Howsmelly!Theyarestilldirty!

(突然想起)Lunchhasgone!Ihavetowashthemmyself.

(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I’msohungry!Butthere’snobreakfast!(捡起地上的围 裙)ThisiswhatLunchalwayswears!Imisshersomuch,andherexcellentcookingskill!Now

shehasgone.Ihavetocookformymotherandmyself.

JM(上):Where’smybreakfast?Where’sLunch?Hasn’tshegotupyet?

J:Mum,can’tyouremember?Lunchhasgone!

JM(沉吟片刻):Well,totellyouthetruthJohnny,asonwithoutawifeisuseless.Lunchisanice

girl,goandtakeherback!

J(立正敬礼):Yesmadam!

Act4

(J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)

A:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!

Theroadisbuiltbyme!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)

B:AndIplantedonetree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)

C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)

AB&C:Giveusallyourmoney!

J(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出１角硬币):Is1maoenough?

(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)

A:Whatbadluck!Thisguyisbroken!

B:Ifwecannotrobanymoneytoday,wewillhavenothingtoeattonight!

C:Iheardthatthemayor’ssonisgoingtomarryMissLiuLanzhinextmonth.WEcangoand

robthewedding!

A&B:Goodidea!

J(惊讶):What?What?Lunchisgoingtogetmarried?It’simpossible!

AB&C:Why?Aprettygirlandarichman,whatagoodcouple!

J:ButLunchismywife!Wehaven’tgotdivorcedyet!

(突然有了主意)I’vegotanidea!Youaregoingtorobthewedding,don’tyou?I’llgo

withyou.YoutakethemoneyandItakethebride.

B:Haveyougotanyexperience?

J:No.ButI’vegotthis!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄１，０００，０００)

Act5

(转眼已到了婚礼之期．MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台) (J和三强盗跃至台中)

ABC&J:Heyyou!Stopandlistentous!

A:Theroadisbuiltbyme!

B:AndIplantedonetree.

C:Ifyouwanttogobythisstreet---

J:Giveusallyourmoney!

(L听到J的声音，掀起了盖头)

L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后)

(MS大怒，挥拳向J打来．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L晕倒)

J(火冒三丈):Howdareyoubeatmywife!（挥拳向MS冲去）

(J与MS混战，JM上，以拐杖击晕MS)

(J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)

J(扶起L，关切地问):Honey,howareyou?

L(哭状):Ihurtalot!

J:Don’tcrybaby.I’llgoandfetchthemedicine. (下)

L(起身去追):Waitforme! (跑下)

(音乐起 CanYouCelebrate)

Big words of western tour （大话西游）

Chapter 1

Site：The wedding

Characters:牛魔王 、至尊宝、紫霞、小妖

Aside: The story begins with a wedding. The Bull King is going to have a concubine.

牛：Today is my wedding. I am going to have a concubine. Ha ha ha „„.

妖：Concubine? Dose your wife agree to it?

牛：Oh! She is not lovely anymore. She’s right now at the Flame Mountain. She can do nothing about it!

(至尊宝从后台走入人群中)

牛：Let me introduce my brother to you! My bro!

Come here! This is my brother.

(牛深情地转向紫霞)

6人简单搞笑英语剧相关热词搜索：6人英语搞笑话剧剧本 6人英语搞笑剧本 6人英语小品剧本搞笑